Topic: Story (Read 317507 times)

Firestar · « **Reply #200 on:** December 28, 2009, 20:26:18 »

The driver then revealed himself as Dr Terry Russell, and proceeded to pull away from the police officers at frightening speeds.

Saphire · « **Reply #201 on:** December 28, 2009, 20:27:58 »

In the wrong gear, promptly shooting backwards into a tree...

jammydodger · « **Reply #202 on:** December 28, 2009, 21:41:58 »

From the leaves of the tree fell hundreds of jars or Marmite, one of which conveniently landed on Terry's sandwhich bread in his lap after falling through the sunroof, top side facing down. All of its contents spewed out into one big pile of Marmite and Terry decided he'd still eat it as it was. The Police succumbed to the Marmite after receiving Marmite darts from the gun on the roof of the Marmitemobile.

Firestar · « **Reply #203 on:** December 28, 2009, 22:28:06 »

He then proceeded home and the police officers never found him. He was though, discovered by ace detective Wave Music, and was turned in.

jammydodger · « **Reply #204 on:** December 28, 2009, 22:52:14 »

But to his luck, he remembered he still had several jars of the hundreds that fell off the tree. So, during the search, he offered the officers a Marmite sandwich. They were intrigued by this 'tasty, goey brown susbtance' and removed all of Terry's Marmite, much to his disappointment. When he was escorted out of the building, all charges dropped, the officer at the desk asked, "Why is he free?" One of the others threw him a Marmite sandwich that kept him quiet for ten minutes! As soon as he was out of the building, Terry drove to the bank in the Marmitemobile and withdrew Â£299.99 to spend on...

Stuart2007 · « **Reply #205 on:** December 28, 2009, 23:39:09 »

Once upon a time, there was a community of Marmite worshippers. Who for some considerable time- at least a few months- had happily worshipped the God of Marmitianity.

Then came along the evil darkness of the Terryfer, who had been cast down into the eternal pits of Vegemite by the Lord of Marmite- intent on revenge, he stole the Marmite from the people, and declared himself God of the Church of Marmitianity.

jammydodger · « **Reply #206 on:** December 29, 2009, 00:15:49 »

Where does this come in? Or have we started a prelude?

Edit: Chapter 3 I guess!

Firestar · « **Reply #207 on:** December 29, 2009, 00:32:06 »

"Where does this come in? Or have we started a prelude?

Edit: Chapter 3 I guess!"

Exclaimed jammydodger!

He then realized, it was only that way because Terry programmed him to think so!..

jammydodger · « **Reply #208 on:** December 29, 2009, 00:48:10 »

After waking up from my scary dream of being a Terryfied (pun intended

) robot, I decided I was hungry. I went to the cupboard in the galley to find there was nothing but a large, plastic wrapped box. I removed the wrapping to find, to my surprise, that it was a box of biscuits. To be precise, JammyMarmiters. I took one from the packet and ate it. It wasn't bad, so I had another. And another. And.... another. And another. Another... Until the packet was empty. Still hungry, I decided to look in the fridge. I opened the door, and to my horror...

Saphire · « **Reply #209 on:** December 29, 2009, 14:03:01 »

...Wave music ran out with a bag maked, "Swag", jumped out the kitchen window, crashed through a fence, several washing lines and then promptly fell in the sea to be eaten by a mythical sea monster called the "Sea Rusell"...

jammydodger · « **Reply #210 on:** December 30, 2009, 00:01:23 »

And all I saw was a dark figure.

Stuart2007 · « **Reply #211 on:** December 31, 2009, 18:02:09 »

And a brilliant bloke named 'stuart2007' wondered why the obsession my MY Marmite...

Promptly afterwards, he passed a law saying that anyone who dissed MY Marmite was likely to be executed. And then they all lived happily ever Marmite.

Saphire · « **Reply #212 on:** December 31, 2009, 18:14:37 »

Until a person, sick of constantly eating marmite came and smashed all of the marmite, and made sure there was no way any of it could return.

Stuart2007 · « **Reply #213 on:** December 31, 2009, 18:30:35 »

Quote from: Saphire on December 31, 2009, 18:14:37

Until a person, sick of constantly eating marmite came and smashed all of the marmite, and made sure there was no way any of it could return.

EDITORIAL NOTE: I motion that this sick, sick individual be banned from this topic for his weird, offensive and perverse comments about Marmite.

Said an angry Stuart2007 as he ate his Marmite on toast

Saphire · « **Reply #214 on:** December 31, 2009, 18:36:40 »

Until the same fed-up person came and destroyed it, therefore preventing him from eating it.

jammydodger · « **Reply #215 on:** January 01, 2010, 20:43:24 »

That person was found dead in a large vat of Marmite at London's Marmite factory in Marmyde Park. Killed by, who knows? Another of those dark figures... This one covered in Marmite himself, licking it off as he ran from the building to the safety of his Moody 30 in Wellington Dock at Dover, the Sulac, only to be greeted by none other than...
Queen! The legendary rock band returns. One of them had just put a chicken in to roast, while all of them sang the last few lines of 'I Want it All' - "Gimme gimme gimme gimme, I want I want I want FAT CHICKEN!!!"
The figure collapsed on the jetty, as Queen raised a flag on the mast which had a picture of a jar of Marmite, next to it was the text 'Stuart2007 for Marminister!'
Then came...

Stuart2007 · « **Reply #216 on:** January 01, 2010, 23:00:52 »

A gigantic talking lamp post that came running up to him, demanding his money, mobile 'phone and car keys, before instantly morphing into a large caricature of Donald Duck.

Right then, the whole world started spinning- twice as fast as usual- and he fell over in the gutter.

When he woke up, he swore he'd never drink cognac at new year ever again...

jammydodger · « **Reply #217 on:** January 01, 2010, 23:32:10 »

"That's not a very nice way to treat a defender of Marmitety!" said Marmitus to his wife, Marmiteosus.

llamalord · « **Reply #218 on:** January 02, 2010, 00:00:54 »

Followed by the sounds of the Disclaimer message from the beginning of Uncontrolled Airspace, the general Aviation Podcast.

jammydodger · « **Reply #219 on:** January 02, 2010, 01:30:11 »

Which were silenced by the thunder of Marmitus destroying the complete General Aviation Podcast as well as all others before, and the recording centres and studios, even the people whose voices were used.
At the end of it all, Marmitus stood up, and poked a boulder which was hanging precariously on a cloud. If fell at ever quickening speeds down to the Earth below, and landed right on top of the funnel of the Red Eagle which was about to dock at Ryde. Instead of what you might expect, (I.e. a huge bang, the waves crashing, the ship sinking) the rock slowed down and made no impact on the ship. The amount of pressure building up beneath it sent it flying, and it crushed the elephent that sprayed Capt. Matt in New York.
Marmitus then decided to...

matt5674 · « **Reply #220 on:** January 02, 2010, 03:07:18 »

Fly to Jupiter and meet the might Mad_Fred where he...

kevin1gamer · « **Reply #221 on:** January 02, 2010, 03:23:13 »

met a bunch of aliens that...

Minime · « **Reply #222 on:** January 02, 2010, 03:24:13 »

were made out of marmite

matt5674 · « **Reply #223 on:** January 02, 2010, 04:45:52 »

and somehow vanished and were found knocked out in...

Stuart2007 · « **Reply #224 on:** January 02, 2010, 09:28:31 »

...a... big... jar... of... Marmite...

(fairly obvious line really)

Author Topic: Story (Read 317507 times)

Firestar

Firestar

Firestar

matt5674

matt5674