Hmmm. Humour is a subtle thing....
Anyway, I am English. It's my language. I very kindly allow some other countries to use it under license.
(As a "humour alert", that was a joke).
My wife is American. So that Americans have to call the language "English" and not "American", we don't allow them to use it for one day every four years. That is the day on which they elect their President, speaking only gibberish.
(As a "humour alert", that was a joke).