Ship Simulator
English forum => Small talk => Forum Games => Topic started by: saltydog on October 31, 2009, 21:13:02
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Let's try this: a collective story
Each person writes one sentence, then must wait 2 following sentences to write another..
Ok, I'll start:
"As the sun slowly set, he lay in his bunk and could hear the waves gently lapping against the hull..
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...But then he realised that in fact it was an old man tapping the hull with his stick, to let him know that he had run aground.... :lol:
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...but then he woke up and found out his wife was slapping him with coloured duct tape in his pale face...
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As he awoke from these nightmares with fright, he looked out of the porthole and was releived to see that the ship was still slowly sailng forwards..
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So, while he had the chance, he took out his Chart of the Isle Of Man, and decided to plot a course to Larne...but by accident, forgot his 2B pencil...
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So he decided to head to Dover to get some chalk...
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... but they didn't have any so he bought some duct tape, as REVENGE...
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On his way he became hungry and was glad he had a jar of marmite :doh:
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Even though he had so much marmite, he proceeded to have several beers, and a bottle of the finest whiskey around....Which made him quite sick,
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And thus he was unable to pilot the ship around the Evil Marmite Overlords vessel...
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As he leaned over the railing to heave, he noticed an island in the distance..
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he crashed his ship onto the island and while he was laying down he saw a plane fly by pulling a banner that said Dover-Calasis in the same enviornment
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As he took this thought into Consideration, he failed to notice that some Somalian pirates were racing towards him, guns drawn....
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But from the plane overhead jumped a mysterious figure called...
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Stuart2007 with his marmite cannon ::)
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And he proceeded to cover the Pirates in Marmite...
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...Because he thought they'd like the new recipe
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they said "what is this horrible sticky brown stuff"
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And decideed that they should seek out other prey...
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Whilst listening to some hilarious Irish Prank phone calls that they had found on Youtube...
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wait, no, wasn't the "why is the rum gone" remix?..
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He then saw the Monarch charter boat in the distance and waved her down ;)
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And found that the Skipper had dissapeared...Almost like the Mary Celeste...With no Crew..
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Then the Marmite Man appeared from the skies and declared in a booming voice: "Findest thou the sacred Marmite Jar".., that shall be thy Quest..
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he still managed to get onto the boat and drive himself to New York Harbour :doh:
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but he couldn't, his face had been so hard slapped almost every braincell was dead, he couldn't even open the door himself..
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Then he took a smoke of some wacky backy he had bought earlier, and felt fine again, and sailed all the way back to Marmite Land, where seagulls are made of chocolate, and Spiderman doesn't exist...
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He awoke in the morning in his bunk, with a strange craving for Marmite..
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Then the seagull picked him up and the seagull dropped him onto the deck of the ferry my dad captains in New york harbour......... ::)
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...when Matt tried so sail away with his fathers Ferry, he found out that there was missing a small bolt on the engine...
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Suddenly, an elephant appeared..
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And all of a sudden a plane landed to the port side of the vessel ::)
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The elephant, startled by the unexpected landing of the plane, fled..
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And sat on Matt by accident...
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:'( So Matt used his macho muscles and threw the elephant into the ocean :doh:
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However this made the elephant mad, so he squirted Matt with water from his trunk...
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After cleaning himself up, Matt sailed home and watched an episode of Family Guy...Which he found rather amusing,
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After watching family guy I flew to ireland to have a boxing match with Jack :evil:
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After watching family guy I flew to ireland to have a boxing match with Jack :evil:
Witch I lost because jack had 3 leaping leprechaun's with big shalalee's to help him
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In desperation, Matt wipped out his Chainsaw to try and chop the leprechauns in half, but unfortunately forgot his can of 2 Stroke....So in a last ditch attempt, he threw his chainsaw towards the first leprechaun but missed...Insted hitting an on-coming Wagon which had some angry Monkey's in it...while Eric stood there and said "Smooth Move, Chainsaw man"...
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Little did they know that from living in the ghetto I have running skills, so I ran away I hijacked one of those ugly european trucks..vroooooooooooooooommmmmmmmmmmm...problem solved :evil:
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Until I discovered that the truck was not european it was agent austins and the vrooooooooooooooom
lasted 2 sec's and I found myself looking at a truck full of angry monkey's
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So the angy monkeys chased after Eric in their Marmite Injected ex. NASA rocket car...
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So the angy monkeys chased after Eric in their Marmite Injected ex. NASA rocket car...
Which was being fuelled by a Marmite based fuel...
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they raced all the way to the netherlands to vsteps office and started to complain that Extremes is delayed once again ::)
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But from thre office appears a invisble unicycle...
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Which ran into Eric, as it emerged from the building....
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So Fred wrapped his unicycle around Eric's neck, as the gathering crowd roared with laughter at such a funny sight... :lol: :D :evil:
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So then Terry showed up :P
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And ate the marmite from the Monkeys Marmite based fueled rocket ;D
But then he...
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And ate the marmite from the Monkeys Marmite based fueled rocket ;D
But then he...
got sick and barfed on matts face :P
then i laughed and me and matt got in a fight
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of course matt won with his mecho mucles whene he threw the elphant off the boat
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So I went over to the pair of ye' and smacked your heads together and through you both through V-STEP's office window...Then Traddles came along and beat Fred up and wrapped his stick around his neck and said "...In my day..........."
:lol: :D
(Just having a laugh of course :P)
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:doh: Then gibby and I came out of the office and smacked jack across the head with a smoked hering (Idea stolen from good ol Aad) ::)
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then me an matt beat up traddles for hurting fred ;) :) :lol: :D
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....and then there was complete silence...
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As people wondered why everyone was fighting...
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And then Jonah shouted out "Lets go play ShipSim" ;D
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No one listened, and they stared at their computer, wondering what to do
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No one listened, and they stared at their computer, wondering what to do
as soon as they found out what to do the power went out at the vstep office :P and ................
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Everyone went crazy on the PC's, trying to make them work, and calling Tech Support :doh:
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but Tech Support also has no power, so
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my brothers ADHD HYPERNESS generated power and used it to power the PCs :P (my brother dosnt have adhd i was using him as ex. but he is realy hyper though)
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Everyone woke up the next morning to find they could play Ship Sim again...And we all lived happily ever after...Until Eric called 911/999 after having too many beers with his mates...
Police cars and fire engines screeched around the corner, and....
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tackled Eric.
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But realized it was the fisherman from the documentary a life apart so took him to the
police station were he swapped story's about a life at sea.
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... afterwards he was released, and his stories about being a fisherman were published in the BBC's Panorama. After the press conference promoting the programme, he hit the bar again. Sometime later he staggered back off to the Ship Sim Forum, in the darkness, to seek revenge on ...
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The people who started the roumor that he was a heavy drinker when in fact he is like
MAD FRED, TRADDLES ,JOMACH, TERRY, T.J.K and all the other mods just a nice gentle
person who just happens to have a big stick when needed.
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...He got back to the Forum and after hunting the many rooms and floors of the forum found Jacks room. He kicked the door down and found jack in the corner...
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Then he woke up, realising it was all a hideous dream and that he hadn't collectively thought of the most insane story in the history of the planet known as earth...
EDIT:Spelling :(
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But not before he started SSE and enjoyed Dover - Calais in the same environment.
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I thought this was the never ending story ;D
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"I thought this was the never ending story ;D"
.....Said Eric, waving his finger around at Wave Music....
Out of nowhere, a hairy cave man named Terry jumped out and ran after Stuart with his big wooden hammer...
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Until Stuart stopped, holding the bread to the Marmite jar, warning Terry to drop the hammer or the Marmite would 'get it'.
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and then the Marmite got it and marmite no longer existed............Meanwhile back on planet earth the man was still trying to get to america without an elephant or some other wild thing jumping out of the sky ::)
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And Marmite was re-incarnated on the bread and was celebrated every year, at a time of year called YEASTer.
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Can someone go since I cant go yet :P
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"Can someone go since I cant go yet :P"
Said Matt as he read a story to his little brother
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as matt was reading to his little brother in his room, there was a very loud thud. matt got up, put the book down and went into the room beside to find that the Lagan Viking had fallen from the sky onto part of his house :lol:
http://www.shipspotting.com/modules/myalbum/photo.php?lid=998330 the LV, for those less familar with her ;)
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Luckilly the roof was made of rubber bands, so the Lagan Viking bounced off and landed in the river beside..
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Although the ship landed safely, Matt was struck dead by the rubber bands when they snapped upon recoiling.
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Matt then went up to heaven with his harp and his wings and he stood before a giant and almightly version Fred and Terry, who looked back through the forum only to find that Matt had been a naughy boy so they ...
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Sent him to hell. Which we all know as 'planet earth'.
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Planet Earth being known as "H-E-Double Hockey Sticks" all began in the year 2684 A.D. When David Tennant (The Tenth Doctor Who) ...
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(This story always involves me getting hurt... trying to say something ::) ) The gods were one day feeling very kind and decided to make me live again!
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......and Matt he......
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went to see llamalord and asked him what on earth he was waffling on about hockey sticks for.
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And the almighty one replied, " 8) "
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Calm Down Dear, it is only some Marmite...
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Matt then returned to PLANET EARTH for the 10th time to see how the man was doing on his journey and offered him a tour on the yacht his father works on ::)
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and suddenly they see this big ...........
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... small thing.
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that was actually quite large. :C
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And was filled to the brim with very...
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..ice creme with......
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dead bodies ontop.
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and llamalord run scared home to mommy and ............
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found that she had been turned into a lizard, A shame to all llamas...
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a lizard he cry :'( watt shell i do now........
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But the lizard grew until it was really big, and chased the Llamalord all the way to...
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to the harbor and Llamalord try ed to ..
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fight the lizard with a pointy stick. However the lizard broke the stick and ate it...
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.. When all of the sudden they hear a loud crash of a ship hitting the land and Llamalord looked and got hit by Titanic cause she..
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had seen a iceberg and was afraid to hit it with the............
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with doctor who at the helm.
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However the Doctor Who got in his TARDIS and flew away (or whatever Doctor Who does in it) and landed on a Galaxy, far far Away...
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but was a color revers of our galaxy because..
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So then he visited Matt in NY and they decieded to try and live their lives without an Elephant dropping out of the sky A marmite monster attacking A boat sinking The world ending Parents turning into animals an inanimate object attacking us etc etc etc ::)
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But they Failed! ;D
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And the Imperial from Star Wars invades NY, and the Republic depends on..
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>:( Ignoring the last two comments Matt decided to make an ocean journey on a 116 ft Nordhaven
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and Matt start to fish after swordfish , and he struggled to get it .....
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Because their pointed noses kept pucturing his dinghy...
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As my dighny started to sink I raced back to the garage of the yacht ;)
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Where I leapt on a Hovercraft to take me all the way to...
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Rome, Italy where they find the ruins that tells..
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there was once a Viking here ;)
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Who was destroyed a long time ago when Doctor Who visited Earth for the first time. ::)
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Scared by that thought, Matt got the yatch lit and blasted his way out of the Med, and back to the Atlantic. Starting to get bored now Matt pushed a button he had not pushed before and .....
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little did he know that this button would cal for the assistance of Doctor Who. ::)
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but instead of Dr Who landing on the deck of the yatch....
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NASCAR driver Dale Earnhardt Sr.'s ghost came to..
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ask if I wanted an autograph I relplied Yes and sold it on ebay...meanwhile I was cruising into Miami Florida
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When suddenly Matt saw a rogue wave to starboard, got mad at his girlfriend who wouldn't answer the phone, and threw his cell over board ;D
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(Sorry for posting when it isnt my turn But...) Hahahahahahah lol xD ;D Actually its more the opposite xD Anyways back to this story that mostly involves me :doh:
EDIT Ill Just continue
So after I did that I knew I couldnt return home without having my will in place so Off I went for a trip around the world ::)
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A board the MS Poseidon of Poseidon Cruises and fell into a lifeboat with his favorite..
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Girl from school! And then....
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:-* :doh: :thumbs:
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found the girl got seasick so left her behind as he sailed all the way to...
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the island of Ithica, The home of Odysseus in Homers, The Odyssey (in ~2000 BCE)
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Christmas was celebrated on Selsey II when suddenly...
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The Grinch Monster - otherwise known as...
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Scrooge_2007, in his little sailing boat, was mowed over by Selsey II...
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Scrooge_2007, in his little sailing boat, was mowed over by Selsey II...
this made him very angry, so he
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flew his sleigh into TFM's house....
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And caught TFM with a ferry on the sofa..
:lol:
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...Then came the deep sounding horn of...
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SR-N4, piloted by McGherkin...
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Who gave a lift to STUART2007 all the way to Jacks house, before beating him to within an inch (2.5cm) of his life.
(but only in a NICE and friendly, festive way of course- I am FIRMLY opposed to violence...)
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Who gave a lift to STUART2007 all the way to Jacks house, before beating him to within an inch (2.5cm) of his life.
(but only in a NICE and friendly, festive way of course- I am FIRMLY opposed to violence...)
but whene evry one came back to the ss forum we found scars on jacks back from a whip of stuarts........
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but whene evry one came back to the ss forum we found scars on jacks back from a whip of stuarts........
And then everyone thanked gibby12 for his useful comment.
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And then everyone thanked gibby12 for his useful comment.
then gibby became extremly confused ???
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as always :evil:
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as always :evil:
then Karma hit matt. and a elphant fell from the sky and smashed matts face in
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then Karma hit matt. and a elphant fell from the sky and smashed matts face in
Charming. And Matt was very upset that the face on his closk was damaged by the 'jumbo jet'. So he sat back, had a pint and wondered what line should come next
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And a Goderator killed gibbys post for being offensive...
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then a lovley nurse came out of no where and fixed matts face and the he thanked her :-* :-*
Charming. And Matt was very upset that the face on his closk was damaged by the 'jumbo jet'. So he sat back, had a pint and wondered what line should come next
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Before stuart2007 remarked that this storyline is getting more and more ridiculous by the second.
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he.......
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And McGherkin agreed, but knew the story had to continue, so over in the phi phi islands...
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Stuart2007 stepped aboard the smaller of his private yacht fleet, and wondered what it was like when it was the cunard flagship.
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When suddenly, an army of Paddy's boarded the vessel armed...And ordered Stuart to put his hands in the air!
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and dance the disco!
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But Stu courageously legged it, and jumped overboard...
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Into the sea if Marmite he had been slowly sailing in
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So the Irish army surrounded him with Warships...And shot him point blank.
The next day...
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The Irish Navy wondered why the army had taken there warships...
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(Ultimately, Because they are Irish) :lol:
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And what that big black submarine shaped thingy was, whilst they were watched carefully through its periscope by...
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Johnny Cash, who was eating...
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Marmite, brought aboard by a stowaway called...
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Captian Ahab, who was thinking about...
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Eating Marmite..
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whilst he...
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Drank Marmite ::)
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And phoned Marmites Anonymous to book a meeting to stop his terrible addiction to...
(If anyone say's marmite, I will throw a chrismas turkey at them :))
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And phoned Marmites Anonymous to book a meeting to stop his terrible addiction to...
(If anyone say's marmite, I will throw a chrismas turkey at them :))
MARMITE MARMITE MARMITE
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Marmite
(he said it first!)
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:D I guess I kind of asked for it. Now, get back on topic!
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Chapter 2. Revenge of the Marmite man
Once upon a time, there was a jar of Marmite sitting on a supermarket shelf
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It was knocked over by a man who said "One down, 10,00000 to go!" This was heard so...
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By a deaf person who didn't know what he said. But noticed that once he knocked it into his basket he went and bought a loaf of bread, a toaster, a knife...
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Whilst he exited the shop a granny scooter with "Go faster stripes" on, mowed over the poor fellow...
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who them with his last words said...
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"Ouch. That really damn well hurt. Why don't you look where you are going with that damned scooter in future. You stupid old bat"
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The woman then went off on her go faster scooter to the Post Office, to collect her Pension, and heating allowance..
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Whilst on the way, she stopped in at M&S for some...
Well, we all know M&S stands for Marmite and Spreads
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(sorry to interupt but whatch it no cursing on this forum)
that's not cursing....
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Whilst on the way, she stopped in at M&S for some...
Well, we all know M&S stands for Marmite and Spreads
But I turned out for once it had nothing to do with Marmite, and M&S stood for "Machineguns and Sidewinders" and was a military hardware shop...
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that's not cursing....
i didnt type that my cusin did he is a bit crazy with a computer
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Gibby 12
I appreciate you have only just worked out how to change font size, but don't push the point. Also do not presume to quote my posts back to me. If you are offended by the use of damn- a non offensive and none derogatory word then use the 'report to moderator' function.
But do not quote my own words in such large text, as such action is un-necessary.
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(sorry to interupt but whatch it no cursing on this forum)
Oh, and if you're going to start criticising my posts, please buy a dictionary
EDIT: i didnt type that my cusin did he is a bit crazy with a computer
Then keep your cousin away from your computer or make him sign in under his own name.
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Oh, and if you're going to start criticising my posts, please buy a dictionary
HAHA :doh:
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Oh, and if you're going to start criticising my posts, please buy a dictionary
Well said Stuart.
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Gibby 12
I appreciate you have only just worked out how to change font size, but don't push the point. Also do not presume to quote my posts back to me. If you are offended by the use of damn- a non offensive and none derogatory word then use the 'report to moderator' function.
But do not quote my own words in such large text, as such action is un-necessary.
for the last time i let my cusin use my computer he is a bit crazy with them now lets get back on topic please
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But I turned out for once it had nothing to do with Marmite, and M&S stood for "Machineguns and Sidewinders" and was a military hardware shop...
Marmite- Machine guns? They are both powerful, useful stuff but deadly to your enemies.
So, armed with her Marmite firing machine guns, the old granny decided that her pensios was too small, so she used her Marmite Machine gun to withdraw the entire contents of the post office before getting onboard her private boat, formerly the Cenred of Wightlink which she just bought for £400,000
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for the last time i let my cusin use my computer he is a bit crazy with them now lets get back on topic please
Like I said, supervise your cousin in future- not that I remotely believe that for one minute anyway, so a more blunt message from me would be "THINK before you post"... Or just think fullstop, wherever possible
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So, armed with her Marmite firing machine guns, the old granny decided that her pensios was too small, so she used her Marmite Machine gun to withdraw the entire contents of the post office
whereupon she found that she only had 50p, so
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So, knowing that she still had a fiver in her purse, the postmaster pulled out a sawn off and told her to hand it over, whereupon he said "This will help the post office nicely"
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"in fact it will double their current revenue! Perhaps this will encourage them to stop acting like British Leyland workers and GET BACK TO WORK!"
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"Never! It is our duty to act like Leyland workers!" he said slamming the booth door shut. ...
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i didnt type that my cusin did he is a bit crazy with a computer
You should also read the forum rules.
One Account = One Person
:)
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[since we are making political statements (of which I agee)]
"Never! It is our duty to act like Leyland workers!" he said slamming the booth door shut. ...
Muttering to himself as he walked down the corridor, "More like our duty to act like Leyland-never-workers"
(equally you could use any large company that has Unite (or its previous incarnations) whilst under any Labour government)
I find the name 'Labour' amusing... Since Labour means work and under them no one seems to work.
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Thought I might kick start this topic again.
At 8:20pm they turned back for home after..
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Thought I might get in on the act...
....after several rounds of bowling, three lemonades and countless quarter pounder burgers in the back of a mysterious hardware store.
:o :o :o
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They then went to a McDonald's, ordering...
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...another round of quarter pounders with marmite, marmite cola, marmite milkshake, marmite sauce and an edible marmite sick bucket!
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and to finish a Marmite Mc Flurry :doh: haha
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Then they sailed home in the Marmitemobile.
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Which promptly was stopped by the police, for "Driving under the influence of Marmite"...
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The driver then revealed himself as Dr Terry Russell, and proceeded to pull away from the police officers at frightening speeds.
;D
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In the wrong gear, promptly shooting backwards into a tree...
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From the leaves of the tree fell hundreds of jars or Marmite, one of which conveniently landed on Terry's sandwhich bread in his lap after falling through the sunroof, top side facing down. All of its contents spewed out into one big pile of Marmite and Terry decided he'd still eat it as it was. The Police succumbed to the Marmite after receiving Marmite darts from the gun on the roof of the Marmitemobile.
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He then proceeded home and the police officers never found him. He was though, discovered by ace detective Wave Music, and was turned in.
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But to his luck, he remembered he still had several jars of the hundreds that fell off the tree. So, during the search, he offered the officers a Marmite sandwich. They were intrigued by this 'tasty, goey brown susbtance' and removed all of Terry's Marmite, much to his disappointment. When he was escorted out of the building, all charges dropped, the officer at the desk asked, "Why is he free?" One of the others threw him a Marmite sandwich that kept him quiet for ten minutes! As soon as he was out of the building, Terry drove to the bank in the Marmitemobile and withdrew £299.99 to spend on...
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Once upon a time, there was a community of Marmite worshippers. Who for some considerable time- at least a few months- had happily worshipped the God of Marmitianity.
Then came along the evil darkness of the Terryfer, who had been cast down into the eternal pits of Vegemite by the Lord of Marmite- intent on revenge, he stole the Marmite from the people, and declared himself God of the Church of Marmitianity.
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Where does this come in? Or have we started a prelude? :doh: :thumbs: ;) :D
Edit: Chapter 3 I guess!
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"Where does this come in? Or have we started a prelude? :doh: :thumbs: ;) :D
Edit: Chapter 3 I guess!"
Exclaimed jammydodger!
He then realized, it was only that way because Terry programmed him to think so!..
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After waking up from my scary dream of being a Terryfied (pun intended :doh:) robot, I decided I was hungry. I went to the cupboard in the galley to find there was nothing but a large, plastic wrapped box. I removed the wrapping to find, to my surprise, that it was a box of biscuits. To be precise, JammyMarmiters. I took one from the packet and ate it. It wasn't bad, so I had another. And another. And.... another. And another. Another... Until the packet was empty. Still hungry, I decided to look in the fridge. I opened the door, and to my horror...
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...Wave music ran out with a bag maked, "Swag", jumped out the kitchen window, crashed through a fence, several washing lines and then promptly fell in the sea to be eaten by a mythical sea monster called the "Sea Rusell"...
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And all I saw was a dark figure. :o
:doh:
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And a brilliant bloke named 'stuart2007' wondered why the obsession my MY Marmite...
Promptly afterwards, he passed a law saying that anyone who dissed MY Marmite was likely to be executed. And then they all lived happily ever Marmite.
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Until a person, sick of constantly eating marmite came and smashed all of the marmite, and made sure there was no way any of it could return.
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Until a person, sick of constantly eating marmite came and smashed all of the marmite, and made sure there was no way any of it could return.
EDITORIAL NOTE: I motion that this sick, sick individual be banned from this topic for his weird, offensive and perverse comments about Marmite.
Said an angry Stuart2007 as he ate his Marmite on toast
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Until the same fed-up person came and destroyed it, therefore preventing him from eating it.
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That person was found dead in a large vat of Marmite at London's Marmite factory in Marmyde Park. Killed by, who knows? Another of those dark figures... This one covered in Marmite himself, licking it off as he ran from the building to the safety of his Moody 30 in Wellington Dock at Dover, the Sulac, only to be greeted by none other than...
Queen! The legendary rock band returns. One of them had just put a chicken in to roast, while all of them sang the last few lines of 'I Want it All' - "Gimme gimme gimme gimme, I want I want I want FAT CHICKEN!!!"
The figure collapsed on the jetty, as Queen raised a flag on the mast which had a picture of a jar of Marmite, next to it was the text 'Stuart2007 for Marminister!'
Then came...
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A gigantic talking lamp post that came running up to him, demanding his money, mobile 'phone and car keys, before instantly morphing into a large caricature of Donald Duck.
Right then, the whole world started spinning- twice as fast as usual- and he fell over in the gutter.
When he woke up, he swore he'd never drink cognac at new year ever again...
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"That's not a very nice way to treat a defender of Marmitety!" said Marmitus to his wife, Marmiteosus.
:doh: :P :D
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Followed by the sounds of the Disclaimer message from the beginning of Uncontrolled Airspace, the general Aviation Podcast.
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Which were silenced by the thunder of Marmitus destroying the complete General Aviation Podcast as well as all others before, and the recording centres and studios, even the people whose voices were used.
At the end of it all, Marmitus stood up, and poked a boulder which was hanging precariously on a cloud. If fell at ever quickening speeds down to the Earth below, and landed right on top of the funnel of the Red Eagle which was about to dock at Ryde. Instead of what you might expect, (I.e. a huge bang, the waves crashing, the ship sinking) the rock slowed down and made no impact on the ship. The amount of pressure building up beneath it sent it flying, and it crushed the elephent that sprayed Capt. Matt in New York.
Marmitus then decided to...
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Fly to Jupiter and meet the might Mad_Fred where he...
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met a bunch of aliens that...
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were made out of marmite
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and somehow vanished and were found knocked out in...
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...a... big... jar... of... Marmite...
(fairly obvious line really)
-
...which was right on top of a crushed case for Windows 7! :doh:
-
Which [insert name of any fed up windoze (sic) user] threw in despair at the o/s as it gobbled system resources
-
While McGherkin ran the whole lot over with yet another bloody hovercraft...
-
Which was then crushed by the mother of the elephant that attacked Capt. Matt!
-
While McGherkin ran the whole lot over with yet another bloody hovercraft...
Quite WHY the entire contents of the arteries and veins of the innocent bystanders coated the hovermower, is unknown... But McG thanked Stuart2007 for preventing him from getting a goderation ammenment! ;)
Meanwhile, McG learned that the hovercraft was uneconomical and would be retired in favour of DV monohulls, which would ultimately bankrupt their owner anyway... (not enough miles per Marmite)
-
So all of which were crushed by....the mother of the elephant that attacked Capt. Matt! ::)
-
After Matt was uncrushed....................................
-
....the story machine was given a good old size 20 boot by jammydodger. ;D :lol:
-
Suddenly, he spotted a ship on the horizon..
-
Which was full of Pirates after JammyDodger's...
-
Jammy Dodgers, because they tasted like...
-
Marmite.....
-
Which was odd, since they were made with strawberry jam, yet...
-
Which was odd, since they were made with strawberry jam, yet...
On the bridge of the Pride of Bilbao, now languishing in some drydock somewhere due to P&Os general apathy for trade, their passengers, or staff, the captain had left some Jammy dodgers that TFM found did indeed taste of Marmite... and mould.
-
So he got rid of the mouldy bits and ate the rest, before getting taking the Bilbao back to Portsmouth...
-
When it re-started running to Bilbao with the newly formed Trans Marmite[time] ferries...
Unfortunaly the former MD of P&O ferries, recently sacked for running the company into the ground, fell of the dock in disbelief at yet another company taking over yet another one of its routes and then trading profitably, and ended up wet.
So the moral of this story is that jammy dodgers are made from marmite and that ferry company directors are total tossers... Yes, now that they have no jobs they spend all day tossing pancakes.
-
Meanwhile, back at the ranch..
-
McGherkin wondered where WM was...
-
So he walked outside and found him squished by a rampaging elephant.
EDIT: Spelling
-
As did Pete..
Was the rumour true that he had been taken prisoner by Amazones, and was now being held in the Brazilian jungle..?
Who knows what designs they would have on his person..
-
And people wondered who on this forum might know exactly what has happened to WM...
-
Some say he has gone to Siberia to hibernate..
-
All we know, he's called The Stig
-
And he allways travels with a bush.. ;D
-
and a pot of Marmite
-
to create scenic pictures of ugly ships in marmite...
-
to create scenic pictures of ugly ships in marmite...
REVIEW NOTE: Can a goderator please amend TFMs entry?
I find it grossly offensive to have the word 'ugly' along with the word Marmite...
Thanks very Marmite
-
REVIEW NOTE: Can a goderator please amend TFMs entry?
I find it grossly offensive to have the word 'ugly' along with the word Marmite...
Thanks very Marmite
Review Note: WM likes Ugly Ships... thus he would paint ugly ships...
-
Then, suddenly, our hero spotted a sparkling thing in the water..
-
Which came straight from the island in the series 'LOST'
-
And the a Mermaid was swimming to him....
she had not heard about LOST
-
she had not heard about LOST
She should consider herself very lucky.... :lol:
-
And so, our lucky mermaid swam on and on, untill...
-
She found out that Christopher Columbus was wrong, there was no new continent and she fell over the edge of planet earth
-
Fortunately, Worf was passing by on an investigating mission, and he was able to transport the mermaid onboard his ship..
-
Fortunately, Worf was passing by on an investigating mission, and he was able to transport the mermaid onboard his ship..
Before barking to her that to fall off a planet without fighting someone was to live without honour, at which point he threw her out (without Marmite) the spaceship, where she landed on planet wavemusic.
-
It was then that Worf told Stuart of his quest: to find and conquer the Monster of Aargh..
-
Although Stuart 2007 had no idea what he was trying to say, when he suddenly died yelling "aarrrgh"...
Stuart2007 apologised profusely to his convulsing body, and promised that he would never again touch anything that said "DANGER 20,000 volts DC"
-
Then he went to the Vikings metrodome and became an viking!!!!! :thumbs:
-
And thus went on a rampage throughtout Marmiteland...
-
[why does it always come back to Marmite?]
-
Thus He Found A Viking Ship, And Sailed It Into An Iceberg.
-
Thus He Found A Viking Ship, And Sailed It Into An Iceberg.
Which jumped into it, honest. An onlooker sighed. his name was...
-
Hjalmar :doh:
-
And Started Playing A Piano. ( XD )
-
That just have felt from a window coming out from nowere :doh:
-
And landed on top of a car owned by...
-
McGherkin! And lo, he was sore angry so he went to go have a jar of.... (do NOT say Marmite. Be inventive for once...)
-
Jam, that was dark brown, salty, and came in a dark brown glass jar with a yellow lid
-
As well as Toffee on toast, along with lots of cheese...
-
As well as Toffee on toast, along with lots of cheese...
and Marmite... :angel:
-
And red hot molten metal?.. ;D
-
And red hot molten metal?.. ;D
Which he found didn't burn his mouth as much as a thick layer of Marmite
-
And Sir Lancelot Came Along And Ate His Marmite & Sank The Iceberg. ( Impossible ) ::)
-
And Sir Lancelot Came Along And Ate His Marmite & Sank The Iceberg. ( Impossible ) ::)
Very easy to sink an iceberg...
melt it.
-
Very easy to sink an iceberg...
melt it.
but then it wouldn't sink...
It would most likely be hotter then the water around it, so it would still be on top...
-
but then it wouldn't sink...
It would most likely be hotter then the water around it, so it would still be on top...
And McGherkin showed how clever he was by cooling melting it, then deoxygenating the water produced. This would make it heavier than the surrounding water.
EDIT: Strikethroughs! :doh: Cooling an iceberg tends to freeze it.
-
And McGherkin showed how clever he was by cooling melting it, then deoxygenating the water produced. This would make it heavier than the surrounding water.
EDIT: Strikethroughs! :doh:
But TFM wondered how removing the oxygen from water would make it heavier...
-
Butr TFM wondered how removing the oxygen from water woulod make it heavier...
If oxygen floats, then water with oxygen in it will float on top of water without. Think of those oil toys with two layers of oil...
-
but then it wouldn't sink...
It would most likely be hotter then the water around it, so it would still be on top...
Actually, a better point would have been to say that as it would be to say that fresh water is less dense than salt water and would therefore sit on top.
But I didn't think it was going to be a physics discussion. He said as he rammed an iceberg so far down TFMs throat that he didn't need to drink for a month... (all in a very nice, non-violent way of course)
-
But TFM got fed up with al this water so went onboard a ferry
-
But TFM got fed up with al this water so went onboard a ferry
Which crossed the saragasso sea, and its overly oxygenated water caused a reduction in bouyancy... TO overcome this, the captain ordered that TFM be thrown overboard
-
Which crossed the saragasso sea, and its overly oxygenated water caused a reduction in bouyancy... TO overcome this, the captain ordered that TFM be thrown overboard...
Luckily Captain Brown was passing by the ship at that time in the little VSTEP7 and managed to catch TFM on the back of the taxi-boat. It was only then that they both realised what was coming from over the horizon...
-
A
big
pot
of
Marmite
;D
(sorry ignore that. Even Marmite loses its fun after a while)
-
And The HMHS Britannic ( Before She Hit A Mine. ::) ) Came Through The Horizon & Hit The Taxi Boat & The Ferry & Sank Them. ;)
-
So the RAF came over and dive bombed Stuarts house with Marmite.
:lol:
-
at which point stu lost his obsession in marmite
-
Thus breaking the whole universe...
-
at which point stu lost his obsession in marmite
NEVER.
-
And I Came To Stuart07 And Hit Him On The Head With A Pole Making Him Forget About Marmite FOREVER. :angel:
-
Fortunately for all Marmite lovers in Marmiteville, County Marmamite, Marmitaland on the plante Marmitus Loveus, it was only one of Stuart's many clones and thefore Stuart himself kept robotting on and on... :doh:
-
And I Came To Stuart07 And Hit Him On The Head With A Pole Making Him Forget About Marmite FOREVER. :angel:
Have you ever tried lighting a match on a bar of soap? Well, you've about as much chance...
-
Have you ever tried lighting a match on a bar of soap? Well, you've about as much chance...
Melt It Without Setting It On Fire. ;)
-
Melt It Without Setting It On Fire. ;)
Thanks for that useful insight into soap production and fire lighting...
-
Thanks for that useful insight into soap production and fire lighting...
T_T
-
Well, Since Staurts Marmite Loving Diagnosise Is Serious, He Found A Ship Called The Eguene (I Dont Know, Dont Have A Name For A Ship ::) )And Named It The Marmitia. ;D :lol:
-
To which he whistled the tune "Sail away" to as he passed through the English Channel.
Then....A Ferry came along and...
-
was moored up, and left to rust after it's service to Bilbao from Portsmouth was no more...
-
was moored up, and left to rust after it's service to Bilbao from Portsmouth was no more...
UNTIL it was bought by Marmite Maritime services and named 'Y.S. (Yeasty Spread) Marmite'...
And at the launch party, instead of the traditional bottle of champagne being smashed over the bow, it was decided to hit McGherkin over the bow instead.
---
T_T
Thanks for that useful insight to writing rot.
-
And so they did. But the moment McGherkin TOUCHED the hull, he burst into flames. Thsi proved to be a bad omen, for on her maiden voyage she threw her crew overboard, and left to sail the seven seas on her own. Except Terry came along in his invisible-from-the-inside Dortmunder, and roared, '...
-
roared..." this is really quite a silly topic that should either be un-silly or locked" probably. :-X
-
He woke up from his nightmare covered in sweat, and somehow, tears! He was glad he didn't close the topic in his dream, because he's a rebelerator really! :angel: ;D :lol: ;)
Terry started floating upwards, still in a perfectly flat lying position. the duvet was pulled up with him and came off the bed. He righted himself, went to his window, and shouted out into the dark, rainy night "I AM THE TERMINATOR!!!!!!"
;) ;D :angel:
-
Then promptly expired on the floor, after being hit by a fat man singing "Go compare!, when you doubt, check them out, Go compare!"
-
Terry did not in fact expire, as the fat man first thought, but instead was storing energy. He spent five minutes lying there, while the fat man sang about this that and the other... He was eventually found dead, his head hanging from the sign of Terry's local pub, "The Toast and Marmite".
-
Then DJM came back and said, 'I'm here to cash all the cheques you've been writing, Terry.'
:o
Cliff Hanger! Next chapter, start again!
-
Chapter, Uh, Chapter Whatever:
Stuart Found At That His Marmite-Covered Ship Was Actually BBQ Sauce. ;D
-
The Sauce however, was rotten, which caused him to break into tears which didn't stop for 1000 years.
-
This caused the Earth to have a Noah's Size Flood, so everyone got into Cruise Ferries...
-
And sailed to Ireland where they were greeted by Approx 200,000 empty bottles of beer floating around in Dublin Port :lol:
-
useing the bottles, somehow everyone scooped up all the water and sent it to Haiti to help with the Aid effort
-
Which Later Was Sent Back And Told TerryRussel To Hit Ralphy On The Head With It. The Lusitania Soon Came And.....
-
Ralphy asked hmhsbritannic what is it?
-
"It" I The Water You Sent. ::)
-
Ralphy then had a brilliant idea! with all the empty marmite jars that is left over in stu's house he filled them up with the unwanted water and left descritly
-
And Stuart2007 Hit Ralphy On The Head For Stealing His Marmite Jars.
-
at which point ralphy was knocked down but not out. hopefuly to return at a later date to contribute to this topic....
-
Terry The Terminator saw Stuart do that, and promptly walked over and shouted:
"I AM THE TERMINATOR!!!" in Stuart's face, ruining Stuart's hair and giving him whiplash. Stuart turned round and slowly hobbled off towards the beach, as the sun set in the sky leaving its orange Terminator Grey mark across the sea and land... Terry The Terminator looked on.
-
As Which The P6 Dutch Patrol Ship Of Port Of Rotterdam, Came And Kicked The Terminator To Malfunction, & Locked Him Up. Stuart Then Happily Enjoyed His Marmite. Ralphy Was Thrownt Into The Ocean Since He Ate Stuarts Marmite. :lol: ;)
-
Whilst IRI5HJ4CK watched this all from a distance falling off his chair in laughter... ;D
-
As Which The P6 Dutch Patrol Ship Of Port Of Rotterdam, Came And Kicked The Terminator To Malfunction, & Locked Him Up. Stuart Then Happily Enjoyed His Marmite. Ralphy Was Thrownt Into The Ocean Since He Ate Stuarts Marmite. :lol: ;)
He dies.
-
He dies.
Horrifically.
-
atleast that's what stu thinks...
-
atleast that's what stu thinks...
But he reappears in IRI5HJ4CK's Towing Server as a ghost and howls "I bring warning from the future, do not buy SSE, it will be full of bugs and cause your pc to crash reapeatedly!"....
-
But he reappears in IRI5HJ4CK's Towing Server as a ghost and howls "I bring warning from the future, do not buy SSE, it will be full of bugs and cause your pc to crash reapeatedly!"....
Spooky....
-
And so McGherkin prepared for school...
-
As he arrived at the school, he found it floating in the sky..
-
and he fired a SAM Missile at it, making it plumet back down to earth with the sound of...
-
feet in marmite
-
...which doesn't sound as good as Ship Sim Radio, but may taste better :doh:
-
Then McGherkin returned home from school, and tried uploading a 5 min video to youtube, and as yet it has taken 2 hours. so McGherkin said...
-
Then McGherkin returned home from school, and tried uploading a 5 min video to youtube, and as yet it has taken 2 hours. so McGherkin said...
...."CURSE THESE STINKING GADGETS!" And Threw His PC Away. ;D
-
He threw it from his window, and landed in a rather conveniently place rubbish lorry, cracking and splitting every join in the computer and making noises to boot. The lorry then drove off, as McGherkin hung is head out of the window desperatly and watched the truck disappear. That was when he noticed that there was a Barclays Bank over the road, rather conveniently placed next to a shop selling Alienware computers.... :o
-
So McGherkin got on the rollercoaster, and the rest was history.
-
shortly after that Ralphy strangly climbed to the roof of his house and shouted out...
-
PUT THAT LIGHT OUT!!!! (now how do I get down?)
-
Or at least Gherkin THOUGHT it was history, until the rollercoaster got jammed half way through the perilous, thirteen layer spiral.
-
And fell into Ralphy Shouting from Rooftops...
-
Which resulted in a trip to Marmitipatal (Hospital) for the occupants of Ralph's house and everyone who rode the rollercoaster that day. All their injuries were treated with the best cure of the modern age: Marmite.
-
Until the invention of Hovercraft!
-
Best cure = hovercraft? Owwwch....
So all people with any bone injuries were all laid out in lines and run over by a hovercraft. Lovely! :2thumbs:
-
when the hovercraft started it's run over the people Ralphy got up and decided he was much better and didn't need the hovercraft treatment
-
But the hovercraft ran him over anyway and he was instantly and painlessly cured, and Ralphy loved hovercraft for evermore.
-
at which point Ralphy remembered that the first hovercraft, the SR.N1 was built in cowes
-
And shortly realised that ALL the Saunders Roe hovercraft were built in Cowes. 'How Silly of Me!' he said. But Little did he know that creeping up behind him was...
-
nothing, so then he went home and played SS10 but on his screen these words did appear...
-
WARNING!!!! YOU ARE USEING A PIRATE COPY DUE TO THE FACT THAT SSE HAS NOT BEEN RELEASED. THE POLICE ARE ON THEIR WAY TO ARREST YOU!!! At that point Ralphy gulped and...
-
Legged it...
-
To portsmouth where he stole the HMS Victory and at the top of the mast he put the flag of...
-
the isle of wight
(http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_YuTUzBBALhA/Sdta0y2mgfI/AAAAAAAADJI/hepQFE8foIA/s400/Isle+of+Wight+flag.jpg)
-
But it was replaced by this: (http://gcaptain.com/maritime/blog/wp-content/uploads/2008/09/744px-pirate_flag_of_rack_rackhamsvg.png)
And he was blown to bits by the american airforce who mistook him for a british tank...
-
lucky for Ralphy the pride of bilbao was passing on it's last trip out of portsmouth so he jumped on the back and...
-
accidentally fell...And got drawn in by the swirling propellers :evil:
:lol:
-
and whilst the propellors sucked him in, he crashed against the rudder and broke it. Up on the bridge, hundreds of red warning lights came on. 'Oh flip, we've sucked in another forum member' said Captain...?
-
Wave Music, returning from his long 3 week voyage from
-
Are there any more left,was his first idea......
-
'No' Came the reply from NathanC who was living in a cardboard box in the corner of the Forum...
-
However a strong wind ripped the roof from Nathans Carboard house...
-
and sent it flying all the way to Portsmouth, to the Pride of Bilbao and churned up in the propellers. Of course they all broke in to tiny pieces and were flung in the air by a massive explosion (which somehow did NO other damage...).
Tinkle, tinkle, tinkle, tinkle.....
-
apart from the damage to hms warrior which then sank 2 feet and then hit the ground
-
...then exploded into millions of tiny pieces...
Tinkle... tinkle... tinkle... tinkle...
-
while this was happening Ralphy took the solent cat back to cowes, he then ran up to his house and hid under his bed shaking hoping nothing else would blow up
-
...at which point Ralphy's house blew up into millions of tiny pieces...
Tinkle... tinkle... tinkle... tinkle...
The next house blew, and the next, and the next, and the next....
Eventually, all of Cowes was destroyed. The Isle of Wight was lifted, along with the UK mainland and Ireland, up into space by giant elephants, as the Earth sat exploding and exploding again and again into....
MILLIONS OF TINY PIECES! :doh: Tinkle... tinkle... tinkle... tinkle... tinkle... tinkle...tinkle...tinkle...tinkle...tinkle... tinkle...PSSST! Tinkle...
-
At this point WM woke up to realise that this was all just a bad dream, but decided it was too early, so went off tyo go and...
-
At this point WM woke up to realise that this was all just a bad dream, but decided it was too early, so went off tyo go and...
...found someone in his room. "Who... Who're you & what are you doing here?" - asked WM. The guy answered: "Oh I see... Believe or not, but I'm Ferryman." "Is that a joke?" - replied WM back, to which the guy answered: "Of course it's not, I'm Ferryman from SS forum, remember me? Yeah, that Ferryman who doesn't drink, doesn't smoke, has no girlfriend & so on.. Can't you understand?" So WM replied:
-
Why are you in my house?
-
To Which the Ferry Man said
"I am here to show you the error of your ways"...
-
WM then got very scared and -
oh. Sorry. I mean, WM sat there staring at TFM with a sarcastic look on his face, for a few moments. He then whizzed around the room using his magic powers, appearing as just a blurr. The door was flung open, WM sped out, and TFM hobbled along behind him until he reached the stairs, when he fell to his knees and said to himself...
-
Your Post deleting ways are a pain in the stern, could you refrain from doing it in future...
-
To which WM replied: "Sorry, I can't help myself" & went outside, leaving Ferryman standing alone on the knees with a sad look on the face...
-
To which WM replied: "Sorry, I can't help myself" & left Ferryman standing alone on the knees with a sad look on face...
I suppose The Quoting man Will have to visit you as well in the future,...
-
WM then travelled far and wide to the many unknowns of the Earth, and beyond!
Eventually, WM arrived at an island near Borneo. He went to visit the only inhabitant of the island, Kensuke, a wise man who lived in a cave. He got to the cave, peeled back the cloth that was used as a door, peered inside and said...
-
'Hi WM! What brings you here? Not the old Marmite again?'
-
'Hi WM! What brings you here? Not the old Marmite again?'
So you mean there was like 2 WMs? Is it again the WM epidemy?
-
Owww.... you messed it all up! :doh: :evil: ;)
WM was meant to say something not the wise man... GET IT RIGHT! :doh: ;) :lol:
and said...
-
'a post was deleted. Not my fault.'
-
Inside the cave it was dark..Only a candle was burning in the distance, illuminating a door..
-
So WM opened the door and he found...
-
SR-N4 the Princess Anne heading straight for him. So he did the cleverest thing, and...
-
closed the door and ran
-
straight into a giant spider web, which bounced him back through the doorway and down the staircase to..
-
the door again! The SR-N4 was still approachig at a rate of knots, and WM started to run again.
However, the wall was far too weedy to stop such a thing as a Mountbatten class hovercraft, so it simply crashed through the wall and...
Well, WM wasn't crushed. Sure, he was knocked over by the skirt, but then the skirt passed over his head, and like in the eye of a storm, there was relative peace. WM got up, then was promptly hit by the other end of the skirt.
Looking on, a figure was heard to say...
(EDIT: required slight modification to make it work because Pete got there before I finished typing ::))
-
Meanwhile, WM, in his usual fashion, continued to observe the proceedings behind the bushes..
-
because if he was to go into broad daylight then the men in white coats...
-
Would stare at him from distant clifftops, and run away like chimpanzees when he saw them.
-
This would annoy the Men in Blue coats as they would be tied to chairs and forced to watch WM until he went back indoors...
-
to have his morning cup of marmite number 1/2/3/4/5/6/7/8/9/10/11 or his afternoon cup of marmite number 1/2/3/4 or his evening cup of marmite 1/2/3 or night time cup of marmite number 1/2/3/4 ;D
Guess the forumula :lol: :doh:
-
This annoyed Stu as it took presious Marmite away from him, so he decided to...
-
Give up drinking Marmite and sniff it instead. :doh:
-
Just then Gordon Broon arrived at Dover, fell in the sea and due to a strike by the French workers now working the port, no one was available to stop the useless piece of flotsum from drowning...
Just as Stuart2007 tried to help him out of the water, someone pointed out that standing on his head saying "damn it, drown you piece of 'seaweed'" wasn't helping.
To which, Stuart2007 said "tough"
and then....
-
McGherkin came over from another topic in a hovercraft, said 'Stand Back, Stu!' and finished the worthless politician off...
From the sidelines...
-
To which point tuart2007 warned mcg that saying such things could be classed as incitement to murder... and WORSE could be classed as criticising the government (and thereby being a devisive influence).... Just as Stu said that (too late) Fungus McBrown announced that he was going to use the civil contingencies act to suspend parliment and run the country with the executive of the privvy council...
McG, who was arrested as an enemy of the state said "it's ok. my lawyer will get me off... After all, this IS Britain..."
To which, Stu replied..."Sorry McG. You are right. This IS Britain."
McG replied "Ah, damn. I've just realised how stupid it is to rely on a fair trial, since the CTA abolishes right to trial by jury..."
-
But then McGherkin rightly pointed out that Stu was just as responsible as McGherkin, since until he arrived, Stu was
standing on his [G.B.s] head saying "damn it, drown you piece of 'seaweed'"
We are both enemies of the state. But only one of us is a complicated computer algorithm designed to post in a human-like way.
Meanwhile...
-
An Englishman an Irishman and a Scotsman were...
-
Not in a pub! They were Stu, Jack and McGherkin, and they were at Dover, or Douvres as it's now to be called. Jack calmly said to Stu...
-
"I AM NOT &*(^&%^& STRESSED! ALLRIGHT?" >:(
Then Stu said it was down to Jack drinking too much Irish Guinness, and why didn't he have a proper pint of British lager, made by either Stella, Kronenburg or Carlesburg...
But then he saw on the TV news-
-
Le Douvres est acheter a la Francaise!
-
To which Stu said "M*e^d%!" and chucked the TV out of the window.
-
To which Stu said "M*e^d%!" and chucked the TV out of the window.
However it landed on top of Jammydodger, who then...
-
Exploded in a cloud of red, and left one of his trademark biscuits on the floor, on top of his grey flat cap. Jammydodger was then seen at nearly midnight in...
-
The Middle of nowhere, just off the M6, in just his...
-
Flat cap (which mysteriously teleported after the Jammydodger biscuit was eating by a passing MP), red devil pants and black socks!
-
...and a ja of Marmite, which-
-
exploded, covering jammy dodger in marmite from flatcap to Red Devil Socks...
-
In a sulk, JD went to see TFM... Who by now was living in the New French Republic of Douvres.
-
@TFMYou mean black socks. The boxers are Red Devil. GET IT RIGHT! :doh: :evil: ;) :thumbs:
Jammydodger was then knocked down by the swinging arm of a passing crane. A crane? Operating, at 20mph going down the Douvres dockside.. :doh:
The crane was driven by a 2D cartoon character from Germany. He wore a blue shirt which matched his blue tights, and black shoes on his tiny feet. He had hair like a baby, only slightly more. Leaning out of the window, he said to himself "Right into mein trap..." before his head was ripped off by the wall of the tunnel it hit. (tunnel? :doh:)
-
[I'd like to add a brand new chapter...]
One day, Dover was sold to the Europeans!
[Nah, forget it. Such ridiculous fiction could never happen. TOO unrealistic.]
-
One day, Dover was sold to the Europeans!
Don't forget that we are fully paid up members of the EU now...
-
Don't forget that we are fully paid up members of the EU now...
Just like we were in 1066... Britain regained its right to self Governance (apart from a brief period with William of Orange... (Blame the Dutch! (Europeans again!!!))).
It was attempted again from the late 1700s until early 1800s (blame the French- Napoleon!) and it was attempted again in 1939.
GO AWAY EUROPE! Britain is NO LONGER WORTH INVADING... Unless of course you plan on invading for reasons of regime change... In which case, you are all welcome my dear, dear European friends... (Is now a good time to mention that our government has dossiers of mass deception which can be emailed to Europe in forty five seconds
Joking aside (for those with no humour) I AM NOT anti European at all, just anti limp wristed, self doubting, nation hating, apoligistas who run our country and stop us taking an ACTIVE part in our worldwide responsibilities (not including bombing stone age countries).
-
And seems to hand out free money to people who deserve it least... Namely the people who snapped the badge off the front of my mum's car the other day... >:(
-
HOW do you know that it was done by an expense-fiddling MP?
-
MP/Chav=same thing...
-
R.e. Napoleon - He was actually Corsican. He just led the French (just :angel: ).
-
Chapter XXI
So All the members of the SS Forum and also Napolean were sailing together in a boat, when...
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Napolean said to the others "I am going-a to change-a my name-a! My name-a is-a now-a, 'Napoleon'! How do ya like-a da new-a name-a?" to which the other commented...
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R.e. Napoleon - He was actually Corsican. He just led the French (just :angel: ).
Napoleon? Which particular gentleman of that generic name do you mean?
Hitler was Austrian
Blair is Scottish
It is quite common for madmen to rule countries in which they were not born.
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Then, suddenly, he awoke from his dream.. it was not a chat...It was a story..
So he turned to the doorknob to find inspiration..
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And behind the door was the newly promoted goderator, named saltydog.
"No. I am NOT a goderator," cried SD....
"Really?" Asked Lord Marmite. "You sure act like one."
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So Lord Marmite grabbed hold of the door knob and entered the room, to discover...
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the chairman and managing director of PO ferries cowering behind a jar of Marmite, worrying about what will happen to them and their jobs once their owner realises what an appaling job they do.
"There, there." Lord Marmite said. "You can do what all other failures do- join the British government."
EDIT: Typing.
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Jammydodger then flew into the room through the open window, again, wearing nothing but his Red Devil pants, black socks and grey flat cap.
He burst out laughing, in a similar way to that of Jimmy Car. He sat, laughing louder and louder for around 5 minutes, being stared at by all others in a room with that "weird alien" look on their faces. He then brought himself to complete composure, and, with no emotion at all on his face, turned to the window, and flew back out into the sunny skies of England.
Inquisitive about the mysterious flying biscuit man, Stu went to the window to watch. He notice that...
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JammyDodger in his pants had nominated Stu to be Prime Minister, and was elected the next day, so he decided that the first thing he would do would be to...
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cry his eyes out on national TV, jump in a pink flying limo, disappear to Borneo, and leave Eddie the Eagle to run the country (in that order :angel: :doh:).
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in actual fact it turned out to be the formation of 2 new laws
Anyone who laughed like James carr, gets locked up.
Anyone who has an obsession with red devil pants, black socks and grey flat caps, gets locked up.
Then he realised he was onto a winner if he locked up anyone who had less intelligence than himself...
With that, 58 million people disappeared.
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And JD wasn't one of them, oh no. JD in fact, had gone straight home and was looking through his wardrobe as he saw the news of the new laws on TV. He quickly removed his cap, pants and socks, and instead, put on a complete tweed suit complete with tweed hat and shoes! He put on a Vic Reeves face, gained 1 stone, and then flew out of the window once more...
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And at that point, Prime Minister, Lord Marmite 1st decreed that it is also now ilegal to wear tweed...
But, apart from that, was he shocked when it turned out the alien from star trek/wars actually was real and it went of to...
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[OFF TOPIC POST... Isn't this topic great? You can post total utter rubbish in order to increase your post count, and the goderators can't do anything about it (within reason of course!)....
What other topic can you talk about flying ships, Marmite et al and not get banned...? Not many topics about Marmite, OR flying ships...]
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JD decided to play it safe...
He knew that everyone in Britain loved Marmite...
So he bought a giant vat, filled it with Marmite, and jumped in!
Standing at the window once more, he took a look outside, and flew back out.
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To which point Lord Marmite said that this topic is a total waste of time and getting more pointless, except for ONE redeeming feature... It is a good way to increase post count.
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This meant that Stu was hunted down by Lord Marmite himself and shot in the buttocks with a pure gold bullet.
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What is behind your strange obsessions.. ???
Anyway, I AM Lord Marmite the first of Marmiteland.... And it would be a terryble shame if I had to fight anyone to prove it :evil:
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I dunno Stu... I am both seriously nuts and sick minded :angel: :evil: :doh:
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Well, that's what I thought. But I was too polite to say so ;D
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I'll just up my post count with this one then :D ;) :doh: :angel: :evil:
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-he said, as he posted another pointless post ;D
But just then came the deep rumbling of an angry goderator who turned out to be in fact, a guest...
But that was nothing like as surprising as what happened next, which was-
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Nothing.
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Followed by...
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MORE nothing...
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Followed then by...
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A dwarf saying quietly "cheese."
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At which point TFM said... Cheese!!??? And went running to find the cheese.
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Ralphy then walked in, after being at the hospital after JD exploded his house punched him in the face and said
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"I need your clothes, your boots and your motorcycle..."
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Before saying "stoke me a slipper. I'll be back for lunch."
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And Lo! McGherkin got his laptop confiscated for modelling hovercraft late into the night...
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So instead, turned his hand to world domination by taking over...
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The Marmite factory
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*BUMP* which blew up in a massive cloud of dark brown. All the Marmite proceeded to fly very slowly up into space, as the men in the space station put some toast on, licked their lips and waited.
Meanwhile, in the Micronesian islands, home of the cannibalsus mannus, something very unusual was happening, which, for once, had nothing to do with Marmite! It was...
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Nothing. But then suddenly...
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The Micronesian islands were lifted from the sea, and dumped in George Bush's back 'yard'.
"Now how deyd thayt geyt theyre, theyn?" He asked himself, peering out of the single window in his completely black room. :angel:
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With its bars on the window, locked door and only tony blair for company.
Meanwhile OUTSIDE their cell awaiting trial in the hague...
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Were the Clangers.
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And Bangers and Mash, awaiting to go over to...
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And Bangers and Mash, awaiting to go over to...
Over to Bilbao, from Portsmouth on the Pride of Marmite.
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Which.... was sunk my a marmiteorite half way across the Med. This sparked outrage from the community of science, as this had not been forseen. So, as always they blamed...
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... Ferryman...
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Who wodnered what he had donw, so Wave Music explained...
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....to Ferryman that's "done", not "donw".
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To which TFM replied yes, but my Spellchecker on Firefox has dissapeared, and I type too fast :doh:. So WM said...
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"Use Opera then! :thumbs:"
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But TFM Said how he liked using Firefox...
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To which Shane said.."I use Firefox, and my spell checker is working fine".
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However, TFM checked and saw it said: "British English Dictionary - not compatible with Firefox 3.5.8"
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then Shane said: "Use the American English Dictionary, the only different words are 'harbour' and 'colour'." ;D
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and clanky pointed out that they also spell anything ending in ise wrong too! :P
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However, TFM had apparently made an update so it should work, but when errors were made no red squiggle was found...
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"Maybe," Firestar thought aloud, "You should try seeing if any others are having the issue".
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TFM replied by saying he had run the update again, and now has Spell Checking back... thus the tale of the SpellChecker was finished; However meanwhile over at
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the incredible exploding Marmite faactory
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Stu was found to be...
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stabbing...
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mopping up the mess with slices of toast
EDIT: oops missed he new page
stabbing......
TFM with
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As he cut down zombies made from marmite...
Edit: Thanks for the edit :doh:
With a knife made from Marmite that splattered on contact...
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And was mopped up with slices of toast by Stuart :)...
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When suddenly! Nothing happened. But it happened fast, mind you. The next moment...
[One day I'm gonna copy this whole topic down, compile it into a book and read it to my kids (assuming I have them by then) ...)
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@McG: Best idea I've ever heard in my entire life. !:)
:D :lol:
Why don't you publish it? :doh:
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Why don't you publish it? :doh:
'Because I have no money!' McGherkin Said.
Just then...
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A publisher offered to publish McG's book for free. It sold many millions of copies. The best feature was that it kept updating itself to include all story posts here as they came.
But one day, a sad man who wore nothing that wasn't black, who lived in a black shack, in which everything was black, decided he'd had enough of McG. So he asked TFM to make up a plan. Unfortunately, that plan involved Burger King three times, so he had to find someone else...
That someone was, the one, the only....
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McGherkin, who decided to use...
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Robert Mugabe to kill himself... (?)
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and wooden board, a harness and a bobsleigh.
Mugabe later pulled out of the plan after arguments over who owned a large 300 mile square area in the Micronesian islands.
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The owner got annoyed, as the owner was...
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shipfan55, who did not like this one bit.
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So he decided he would...
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resurrect the Cheryl Cole vs Sausage Roll topic, with a picture of a Giant Sausage Roll.
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Which was in fact much larger then Cheryl Cole, and could also...
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sing better than her...
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And could also
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Charm the eyes off a fat man...
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Hpwever this lead to the Sausage Roll...
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being eaten, and this made Simon Cowell very angry, so he...
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declared war on the land of sausage rolls, and thust started the infamous Sausage Roll War...
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The war caused John Prescott to go mad, and he ate Cowell, ending the war.
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But Prescott was not appeased, and he ate every sausage roll in the world. He then went and lived in his birdhouse (£10,000, Expenses)
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Before building a completely new, giant island in the middle of the Mediterranian (or however it's spelt), building a little duck house on it and moving in there (another £575,000 expenses of course).
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And then filling it full with lots of different food and...
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Drooling over the food for 5 seconds, then the tempation was too much. He ate it ALL, and somehow he only gained 10 stone. ;)
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However the island started sinking...
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So he threw the duck house off. It stopped sinking, and actually rose into the air because of its light weight... ( :doh:)
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Howevere he found he was still sinking so had to call in a doctor with heavy duty Liposuction...
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Which didn't work...
So Prescott threw himself into the Med and promptly bounced 50m into the air on contact. He though he would bounce again. Nope. He went right down to the bottom in a matter of seconds.
Fireworks went up in the sky, and people celebrated all over the World.
But...
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Fish ate all enough of his fat that he floated back to the surface...
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but he also had no hair, and even more scarily, no clothes. He was run over by a brand new 40ft sailing yacht, skippered by my dad and with me at the helm. We watched with laughter as a mass amount of red spurted from the back of the boat.
We sailed back to Dover, to get ready for the big Moody meetup later in the year. It was then that we met someone we never thought we would.... <insert name here that isn't John Prescott :doh:>
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The one... The only...
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Michael Jackson...
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Who did one of his classic dances, tipping his hat, ruffling his arms and legs, and did a backflip into the marina water.
He got up, opened his mouth to speak and out hopped a kangaroo. He then sank as was NEVER EVER seen again, and he lived a happy afterlife in heaven.
Geoff and James then decided to go to the...
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Winter Olympics 2010 Closing Ceremony
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But got there a week to late, so instead decided to
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go moose hunting, but couldn't get a gun license, so...
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Hunted them with a pop rifle
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But the moose got angry so threw cow pats back at them until they run away to...
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Shane's sister Crystal's house. When they got there, they were astonished to see..
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that the roof had blown off and...
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There was nobody there, except McGherkin who had spent his entire morning frying rheostats by running AC current through them.
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This set the floor alight, as Crystal returned, who shouted at McGherkin...
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for being such an idiot, to which McGherkin complained that there really wasn't much to do, and could she possibly open the window to let some of the smoke out.
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She then pointed out that the house had no roof...
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However the amount of smoke generated by the burning components was so vast that it simply would not clear, not even with the roof off, and that an open window might just do it.
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So the window was opened, letting in a strong wind that blew the smoke away as well as...
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TerryRussell, who had been hiding under the floorboards.
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TerryRussell, who had been hiding under the floorboards.
Thinking up yet more extemely minor amendments to existing models in a bid to pass them of as some major creation...
Meanwhile, under the same floor boards, hid the beast of...
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the Dover-Calais in the Same Environment, the...
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SR-N4, and the...
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Big Ugly and hairy,...
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Russell Brand.
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This scared every female within a 500 mile radius to go run and hide, causing...
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Tiger Woods to go insane. But, McGherkin did not care for Tiger Woods, He only cared for hovercraft.
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Thus he went out and brought a hovercraft and took it to...
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the solent and randomly crushed small vessels... :evil:
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Only one of those vessels was Selsey I, and it exploded with such force that a hole was torn in the side of the hovercraft.
(http://www.hovercraft-museum.org/images/damage3.jpg)
(RIP the passengers who died in this crash.)
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The hole was so big, it was bigger than the last time Crystal had measured her waist size..;D
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Then Firestar disappeared, never to be seen again. :o
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...at least, that was what they thought. He was then voted the leader of the Russian-Hawaiian Trade Federation. A company that specializes in the disturbing task of..
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Trading Hawaiian Shirts and Russian Fluffy hats from Hawaii and Russia to
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Anakin Skywalker..
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Who felt he would need them if he were to ever go to a volcanic planet...
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Which later in time, he found out he did. He was much pleased to have access to the appropriate clothing. He was then confronted by none other, than the legendary, Pjotr van Schothorst..
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And then he made a rap video that include davy crocket... ;D
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Who was eating a jar of, err,... jam.
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of the flavour jam, but he dropped the jar onto a...
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barrel, which contained some weird brown liquid...
(what could this be?)
He cast off the pieces of the jam jar despite the cuts they made on his hands, and opened the barrel up to see the bounty inside....
wait for it...
wait for it...
bit more waiting...
and more waiting...
and just a little bit more...
HEY PRESTO!
IT'S CHOCOLATE! :doh:
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But then he ate 1 gallon of the chocolate and then, later in the night puked it up and...
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Found out the hard way where motorway service station food comes from
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At the same time, shouting
"asdfghjkl;;lkjhgfdsaasdfghjkl;'lkjhgrfewq"
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Which confused everyone so they asked what he meant, to which he replied...
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":LKJHGFHJKL:LKJHGFGUIUYGFVHBJKHGCFV BN<M>>?"
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Until Someone decided they didn;t like that language so they...
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Spoke Faroese instead...
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However no one spoke this either so they decided to go onboard a ferry and sail to...
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The Faroe Islands, where EVERYONE speaks Faroese. (Get Anfinn here..xD)
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However Anfinn was no where to be seen so no one knew what the people they met were saying...
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Until they learned that 95% of the Faroese population over 11 speaks English...
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og so kom gamli føroyingurin og fekk øll at undrast...
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And then Shane said..."What does that mean, Anfinn?"
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Ralphy suddenly jolted and relised that shane asked the question over a month ago, in response Ralphy...
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Went onto Google Translate, and...
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Og lærði hvernig á að tala Ãslensku...
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....found that in the drop down bar there was the option to translate to WM language, which would probably look a bit like.....
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I love doing this.
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then Ralphy went nuts and...
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This is becoming ridiculous. I don't even have time to put them on the internet.
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Just before Ralphy clicked on OK The third option finnaly was avalibale
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only it wasn't.
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yet it was
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This is becoming rather silly.
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so after averting disaster Ralphy...
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...went offline. But WM & his evil ferry assistant TFM are still online, so...
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The mayhem was guaranteed to continue...
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and continue it did as TFM let loose a.........
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cream squirter, Before TFM got tackled and banned by Fred he had managed to hit...
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McGherkin. McGherkin became sore distressed, and he...
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stared a giant food fight, in which...
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and ate McGherkin, then walked out...
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So he got into his hovercraft...
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And bravely retreated.
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While the monster decided it DID want him after all and caught the next available hovercraft from Southsea.
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But the monster was slowed by a broken down fastcat and McGherkin
got away retreated to a safe distance.
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Where he decided to try and find some strawberry jelly... :)
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But McGherkin remembered that all the jelly was in the terminal at Southsea, and since the monster was there he couldn't go back and get it.
Then McGherkin remembered that he actually doesn't like jelly anyway and sat down to play with his hovercraft.
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And in his haste to play with his hovercraft, he ripped it's skirt and...
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He apologised profusely, but she walked off.
Oh, wrong kind of skirt.
However this was not a problem as the skirt was a finger skirt and therefore he just replaced the finger with great ease. Because that's what finger skirts are for.
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And he continued to play merrily with his hovercraft all dat until the monster finally arrived from Southsea.
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But by now it was hungry and asked McGherkin where all the strawberry jelly was.
McGherkin continued playing with his hovercraft for the rest of the day.
The next day, in a completely unrelated incident...
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Does this count as a story? ;D
PLEASE DON'T READ THIS, YOU WILL BE KISSED ON THE NEAREST POSSIBLE FRIDAY BY THE LOVER OF YOUR LIFE. TOMMORROW WILL BE THE BEST DAY OF YOUR LIFE. NOW YOU'VE STARTED READING THIS, DON'T STOP, THIS IS FREAKY.
1. Say your name 10 times.
2. Say your mom's name 5 times.
3. Say your crush's name 3 times.
4. Paste this to 4 other forums. If you do this, your crush will kiss you on the nearest Friday, but if you read this and do not paste this, then you will have very bad luck! SEND THIS TO 5 QUIZZES IN 143 MINUTES. WHEN YOU'RE DONE PRESS F6 AND YOUR CRUSH'S NAME WILL APPEAR IN BIG LETTERS ON THE SCREEN. THIS IS SO FREAKY BECAUSE IT ACTUALLY WORK
(Please don't actually forward it.. ::))
About 15 or 20 people (if you can call them that) got blocked for spamming with that on my videos on YT. Aren't you one of them, Shane?
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Haven't you had the one about the little girl who will kill you if you don't copy paste this to 500,000 people?
Chain mail. A great way for uncouth individuals to harvest people's email adresses, for dodgy usage.
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/
/|
/ \
Look, Bob has no head. He has also got slimmer (because i accidentally deleted his torso)
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Good decision.
NEW CHAPTER
CH. 483738377.37
The Horrible Thing of Horribleness.
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For the first time in 2 weeks Ralphy...
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Decided that he would go and...
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McGherkin over what is a better way to travel from Ryde-Portsmouth, Hovercraft or....
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The FastCats or The Wight Ryders...
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Then, a man in a golden robe appeared and said: "Better ten birds in the sky than one in the hand"..
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And then suddenly started trying to sell you dodgy light up souvenir versions of the Wightlink FastCats...
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after the last 10 birds fell from the sky due to the volcanic ash, Ralphy won the death match against McGherkin and declared that the old fastcat's were the best and they will be greatly missed RIP :'(
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Except they weren't. McGherkin rose back from the dead (like I wish the N4's would) and smote thee down.
'FASTCATS SHALL NEVER RULE!!!' He said quietly.
Then...
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The ground started to shake violently . . .
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And jammydodger was reborn! Into...
himself.
Very original.
Yes, I'm back. For about 5 minutes. Just saying "hello again, sorry for not posting those pictures."
Bye, see you when SSE arrives on my doormat.
jammydodger then went to his house, and died on the doormat. :sleepy:
Meanwhile, in the hills of Japan, a master martial arts black belt was teaching a class to his students in the shrine when suddenly...
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Pjotr came in. He wanted the students to deliver copies of SSE to people all around the world! He chose them because he wanted all the copies out by June 6th, and all the planes had broken down due to rubbish addons spewing from the volcano that is Virtual Sailor! He relied on the students' agility and speed to get them out in time.
The master addressed his students. This was a very serious task, with a high reward. If they did it quickly enough, then Pjotr might well be able to slip SR-N4 into SSE before they went out. One of the student's ears pricked up at this. That student was called...
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Jan Deelstra
...who wanted to deliver all the copys rapidly to all mailboxes.
but pjotr sad "No", i will give you an adress where you should bring a copy.
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when Ralphy shouts "Why has this topic been dead for so long?"
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Then a mummy ran into the room and screamed "I like cake!"
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Which confused people because...
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He looked fairly dead..
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And had a sandwich in his hand
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because everyone was looking to the mummy, they did not see that all the copy's of Shipsimulator Extremes were stolen :o :
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which made people cry...whilst the mummy pointed at TFM and said "Do you like cake?"
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to which TFM replied not unless it looks like this (http://www.thepaintedeye.com/anthonys_boat_cake.jpg)
in response to that the mummy said...
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"RARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR* HULK SMASH and killed TFM.
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but then it appeared TFM was not dead but knocked out
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STOP THIS VIOLENCE!!! Boomed Mad_Fred. at which point Ralphy swung through the room on a vine with a machete and diced Fred's head
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Ralphy then continues his rampage by...
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By breaking all the computers in the office.
But suddenly the ocean dream comes running and started strangling ralphy
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luckily for Ralphy TFM awoke from his sleep and said to ocean...
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"I love you"
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But the ocean dream looked at TFM and knocked him out again with his own ferry book :evil:
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...then ShipAdddict walked into the room....and swiftly walked back out again...
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followed swiftly by...
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IRI5HJ4CK...who said to Mike "Do you like cake?"
To which Mike replied..
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I like cake, It is really good to eat. !:)
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but then McGherkin came into room and stole at the cake of off cptnchris his own hands....
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...then over the speakers came an annoucement from VSTEP saying...
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'There will be NO SR-N4 in SSE. Oh, and the release is delayed again.'
McGherkin swiftly fell to the floor, curled up, and died.
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Then the ocean dream grabbed the computer wires and rapped them around McG.....
....BUT SUDDENLY!
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... The bow of the Seabourn Legend came plowing thorugh the building in a big cloud of dust, and out came...
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IRI5HJ4CK, who said "WEHHH wasn't that fun?" jumped off, and decked Lagan Viking for fun...then...
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Devin Came in dropping the anchor on Jack, Woopsie! :doh:
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When jack awoke he was lying on the main console of the berge stahl :doh:
Then he noticed its 11PM in the night....he knew he went sleep walking onto the berge stahl
then......
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Sea Shepherd Rammed his ship because it was leaking oil :doh:
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The eco-terrorists fled, however, as fog settled, and a loud, ominous triple-toned steam whistle sounded.....
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The eco-terrorists fled, however, as fog settled, and a loud, ominous triple-toned steam whistle sounded.....
The Titanic Came from the depths
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The dead bodies came out of the titanic and climed abourd the sea sheperd and berge stahl.
And they started chasing every one :evil: :evil:
But...
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Small children on the forum didn't like this, and cried, and made oceandream feel bad.
So McGherkin took him up in Concorde, and all went well until...
EDIT: Something tells me there was an excellent oppurtunity to advertise how much I like the awesome scary game Cold Fear. Ah well, it's mentioned now.
-
But when the concorde reached 30000 feet.
The ocean dream ejected McGherkin out of the cockpit :evil:.
And....
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McGherkin parachuted down on to the Hovercraft Museum.
But guess who was waiting for him?
It was...
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Dog Chapman from dog the Bounty Hunter
-
But McGherkin summoned the cast of Operation Repo, who not only took his car but also beat the lights out of him.
So McGherkin said...
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Crap I forgot to eat Lunch, so a Bunch of Japaneese Fisherman Offered him Whale
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before McGerkin said something, he needed some mosnter too drink.
So..
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before McGerkin said something, he needed some mosnter too drink.
So..
he got a bull to pee in a bottle and drank it and was more hyper than ever so decided to put his drink into production and called it....
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Relentless.
He then went and got a can of Monster which blew his mind.
BUT...
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Nothing matched the taste of his brand Relentless
-
Except Monster.
Anyway, Relentless doesn't sponsor anything so McGherkin preferred the only drink which supports people like Micheal Schumacher, Lewis Hamilton, Ken Block, Vaughn Gittin Jr. and many, many more.
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But then Relentless was chossen McG's Favorite Hovercraft to be sponsered on it
-
However TFM got bored with all drinks so replaced the lot with
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peanut flavored egg rolls
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But McG noticed something was missing.
He said...
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theres no egg in my roll
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Then he remembered there are eggs in his SR-N4.
When he arrived at the pier he noticed his SR-N4 was stolen :evil:
so..
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He went to investigate and found that it wasnt stollen just somebody had grabbed a knife and popped the Hovercraft :doh:
-
McG yelled "Curse you ginger wolf god and take my gingser soul away!!!"
But suddenly!
-
McG yelled "Curse you ginger wolf god and take my gingser soul away!!!"
But suddenly!
A Bull Ran over him and not just an ordinary bull it was a
-
a bull with pointy hoofes and lazer guns wrapped around him :evil:.
and McG...
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mounted the Bull and destroyed the Norwegian Epic then...
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TFM..Who in the meanwhile was cleaing his ferry (Pride Of Hull.) who is the drydock. he heared the loud explosion from the norwigian epic and saw a large peace of the azipod flying towards his ferry (POH), and the azipod ripped some blue paint of the port side.
TFM yelled..
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TFM..Who in the meanwhile was cleaing his ferry (Pride Of Hull.) who is the drydock. he heared the loud explosion from the norwigian epic and saw a large peace of the azipod flying towards his ferry (POH), and the azipod ripped some blue paint of the port side.
TFM yelled..
BEEEP BEEP BEEEP ****** ****** ******
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But McGherkin came back and kicked derriere with his SR-N4, which wasn't affected by the 'popping', since a hovercraft can function without a skirt.
So McGherkin...
-
started buffing out all the scratches of his hovercraft.
He lookes back and notices TFM comming towards him.
TFM says..
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A ferry! (of sorts)
He was about to hug it when...
-
When a bucket of blue paint fell down from the top of the POH
but...
-
It missed him by inches. But since he was busy watching it fall he didn't notice...
-
that there was a propeller blade missing on the port engine propeller.
so he...
-
Bought a Solid Gold Propeller that said MVEsperanza is Awsome ;D
-
but suddenly the MV Esperanza noticed it was a propeller blade from his own ship.
soo he...
-
Ordered a Repo ;D the POR and when MVE tried to get away on his ship (the MV Esperanza) kept going in circles then.....
-
He said "All stop!!"
But suddenly! :o
-
The boat Had a big shutter and the repo was done and the propeller was back
-
Instead the MVEsperanza got the anchor change into the propeller and ruin them and the rotor was badly damaged when she tryed to stop a wailing ship ...
-
they accidently rammed the nisha maru and...
-
sank beneath the sea leaving nothing but bubbles, but these bubbles were special because
-
They looked like they had IRI5HJ4CK's face on them :evil:
Then suddenly the bubbles turned into a big tidal wave and Jack made some funny faces, then pushed his arms forward and....
(http://www.tipiloschi.net/nino/ninoland/TheMummyImhotep.jpg)
-
Jack was frustrated cos he did not reach it to tug her into.......
-
the port too complete his mission
so he...
-
smashed the control panel of his tug with a hammer and got into his life raft. It drifted for weeks and ended up...
-
somewhere in the atlantic ocean :o.
But suddenly beneath him the " (British nuclear-powered ballistic missile submarine HMS Vanguard)
stopped all engines and emptied all tanks, and started rising upwards
then.....
-
It had to come back to Plymouth for a refit :doh:
McGherkin came and replaced it with a hovercraft. Who needs to swim with fish when you can FLY!!! (about 2 feet off the ground :doh:)
-
And after hours of working on the hovercraft McG was exhausted from all the work.
But the oceandream said too McG...
-
'Can I have a go in one of the new Astute class submarines?'
(http://www.naval-technology.com/projects/astute/images/8-ssn-astute-submarine.jpg)
(There's no propellor because it's top secret and couldn't be included in the picture)
-
Yes said McG.
The oceandream became wild from exitement ::)
Later that the same..McG was in his Freedom90 and the oceandream in his new Astute class submarine
Suddenly the oceandream noticed and said too McG" Your port propeller is missing" :evil:
Soo McG..
(Yes mcg i know about these type of pics)
-
Later that the same..McG was in his Freedom90 SR-N4 and the oceandream in his submarine.
Bravley climbed out of the cockpit window and started walking back to where the missing prop was suppose to be and...
(if the prop design is top secret why would they film how they build it?)
-
But McGherkin said that he had had the worlds best idea, propellerless hovercraft!
(http://www.appliancist.com/dyson-air-multiplier-table.jpg)+(http://www.ship-hunters.be/picture%20of%20the%20month/potm%202009/Jpeg/freedom%2090.JPG)
EDIT: SR-N1 Didn't have propellors Ralphy, only a lift fan...
DOH :doh:
-
Soo now the oceandream knew why McG gave him a propellerles submarine.
In the meanwhile..
-
Whoops spelling mistake i mean SR-N4 :doh:
-
Said Ralphy, as he climbed from the cockpit of a BH7...
-
Said Ralphy, as he climbed from the cockpit of a BH7...
(http://www.defencetalk.com/pictures/data/4444/187216_orig.jpg)
McGherkin looked on admiringly, as the BH7 is basically a baby 'N4.
BUT!!!!....
-
From out of the misty Solent came...
-
a creepy ghost ship...
-
called the black pearl ...
-
piloted by IRI5HJ4CK, who was after...
-
ralphy who stole their treasure chest ;D
-
SUDDENLY there was a big BANG and
-
and the treasure chest exploded into a million peaces
-
then out of the blue oasis of the seas came and squashed the black pearl
-
who was piloted by...
-
a sheep called baarb
-
the sheep sad "beeehhh"
then...
-
it ran off with the Captains hat :o
-
and jumped overbord and landed on ...
-
a tugboat wich was assisting the oasis of the seas.
But then...
-
the 450000000 degree weather..
-
made the ocean water the start booiling rapidly...Suddenly from beneath the cooking water!...
-
Lept a giant leprachaun...
-
called IRI5HJ4CK...that said..
-
"I'm sat in the Stena Office now!"
-
"Playing Stena Monopoply!"
-
Then, suddenly...
-
IRI5HJ4ACK won the game and McG said::)
-
damn the game (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Game_%28mind_game%29)
EDIT: 500th post!!!
-
until McG noticed that IRI5HJ4CK was cheating.
Soo he...
-
tatooed "The Game" All over Irish Jack...
-
No seriously ''the game'' ?? ;D
Irishjack was ofcourse verry mad because he lost :D
and said loud to McG '' I lost the game'' wich made McG think about it...
-
He tought "where is my game skills when i need it"?
then..
-
he whent onbaord a pirate ship,
and sailed to the Caribbean
but suddenly....
-
So Jack got fed up this and decided to deck MCG and declared. "I win"
;D Then...
-
McG said too jack.
ARRRGGHHH JACK!..FOR THAT YOU MUST WALK THE PLANK! ;D
Soo Jack...
-
Got to the edge of the plank...but then...
-
The top of the HMS Vanguard came above the water line just b4 Jack jumped into the water...
The hatch goes open and out comes the oceamdream and says "Jack jump in here in you want too live"
Jack bravely jumped and....
-
Fell down the ladder climbing in hitting his head very hard. He was knocked out and saw (in his dream)...
-
the norwegian epic ;D
he thought.....
-
Am i dreaming or is this for real?
but then..
-
...they all woke up to reality to find themselves in a bath tub, and they were just imagining their little games whilst playing with plastic ships...
-
Then Jack said..
"Why the hell am I in a bath tub with people from Ship Sim?!"
-
Then Matthew Brown told jack...
Dont you remember we just docked and now where at famous reinnasance hotel :doh:
jack....
-
everyone in the bathtub and their little rubber duckies and ships wondered what on earth OceanDream meant by the reinnaassance hotel?...
-
So the oceandream explained too them when they arrived at the pier...
he had too carrie them too the hotel cause they were asleep :doh:
So....
(EDIT: Reinnasance hotel at curacao "very famous,big and expensive hotel")
-
They got to the hotel, but realised it was to expensive, so instead stayed at...
-
McGherkin's Hovercraft B&B, where...
-
you slept on board a hovercraft...
-
It was a wonderful hotel, because when they woke up, they found that McGherkin had flown them to Goodwin Sands, and left them there with the tide rising on all sides! :evil:
But Jack had an idea...
-
... He would simply phone up his new found friends at the stena office, to send out a rescue party!...
:2thumbs:
-
But when Stena Leader came to rescue them, she ran aground!
-
... So Stena then had to send out the Stena Express to rescue the "shipsim bathtubbers" and the Stena Leader crew!...
-
But that run aground too. So they decided to ring up for a hovercraft....
-
But McGherkin was in posession of all of them.
He was, however, willing to negotiate.
The ransom demand was to have SR-N4 in SSE.
-
however, they decided to get a RIB from one of the ferries and put it on the sands - when the tide came in there was enough water to escape to...
-
...Dover,where they anxiously awaited to see if there were any new ferries to take them on the new DCITSE route...
-
...but VSTEP were keeping quite on any new ferries, so they all got onboard the Pride of Rotterdam! All the way to Calais, but what they didn't know was that there was a mystery onboard the POR, a very dark one...
:thumbs:
-
when suddenly an airhorn blows " HOOOOOOOOOOOOONKKKK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
the airhorn came from the oceandream..he said" HELLOO! this topic is becoming dead! wake it up!"
so...
-
Peopkle rushed into the thread and tripped over...
-
and looked at the oceandream and said "what did we miss?"
he replied...
-
What did you Miss? Really great stuff... Such as...
-
the world cup finall 2010 of HOLLAND VS SPAIN.
Everyone...
-
Thought this was ridiculous, since...
-
since the finnal has not ened yet :doh:
so..
-
they went to sit down to find that someone had broken the chair...
-
then it appeared the chair had been broken b4 they even sitted on it :P
so...
-
They decided a ghost must have broke it, so called for the...
-
ghost hunting exquipment.
wich appeard one hour later...but before they realised it was night already.
so...
-
they set up the equipment, when...
-
the ghost appeared and sad "THE FERRY MAN! ill will take over your body! :evil:
TFM...
-
Decided he didn't like the ghost, so decided to
-
run too the oceandream who was strong and ask too protect him..
he..
-
felt the ghost was too scary though, so said to TFM...
-
NO WAY!
the oceandream ran off too his room and locked the doors and windows :doh:
so..
-
The ghost walked through the walls...
-
and the oceandream fainted when the ghost came in his room.
then..
-
TFM felt the ghost was too strange, so called the Ghostbusters, who sang their song (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iCHFVTQKqdQ) as they removed the ghost...
-
Jack said "Hmmm the TV is knackered again", so TFM suggested that...
-
we borrow a tv flaatscreen from McG.
so....
-
...but it was from Tescos so naturally it was broke..
-
So laganviking borrowed vh94's TV...and...
-
decided to watch...
-
...quickly discovered that he was missing The Simpsons on Channel 4
-
soo the quickly added the channel.
untill...
-
...until he could smell his dinner burning
-
until the oceandream saw his spagethi burning. :o
he....
-
decided to let it burn anyway and watch the Simpsons...then...
-
when everybody was watching the simpons
one of them noticed...
-
All of the spaghetti was burning,
so one of them went...
-
turned the oven off when "CRASH"
-
the bathup from the floor above them fell throu the roof and in it was the oceandream who was taken a bath.
He....
-
looked in surprise, and said...
-
This is freaky..
and hided his self under the bathup water.
so....
-
went under water. When he run out of breath and came up, he was surpised to find...
-
everybody went back too the tv room...
he.....
-
decided to go into the...
-
fridge so they can...
-
Chill out with the cans of drink. Meanwhile...
-
while they were still watching the Simpsons, the power fel out.
So, TFM went...
-
And tried to fix the electronics. Unfortunately, TFM knows nothing about electronics, and as usual, they stated to smoke...
-
and it caught fire..
TFM...
-
Didn't know what to do, so asked...
-
virtual skipper too help put the fire out.
unfortianetly...
-
The fire had melted the door handle, so they couldn't get in to put the fire out...
-
The oceandream kicks the door down.
and..
-
put the fire out..
-
oceandream says "The deed it done"
he walks away untill..
-
He saw his shoelace was on fire...
-
Oceandream poored water on his shoelace....
and walked up too his room.
but...
-
had forgot his shoe, which had fell off...
-
he comes back too the place his show was left..i was gone..
he says" Wheres my shoe?" no awnser came
he yelled" WHERES MY SHOE?!" still no awnser..
he...
-
saw the shoe boarding the...
-
Pride of dover.
-
So OceanDream brought a ticket, and went onboard to look for his shoe...
-
But than he saw that his shoe was jumping in sea, so oceandream went...
-
into the R(H)IB onboard, and chased after his shoe...
-
Which tried to escape on a Jetski, so...
-
OceanDream fired a tow cable onto the jetski...
-
but VirtualSkipper cutted the cable because he thoguht it would be funny, and...
-
the oceandream jumped aboard just before the door closed.
and..
-
Picked up the shoe...
-
and threw it on the QM2 which was heading for New York, so...
-
he tought too himself" What have i done??"
he...
-
decided he didn't like the shoe, so brought a new pair...
-
came back too the other members and said " i got new shoes" ::)...
-
but on a morning TFM threw them overboard because he didn't like them.
-
As they smelt like...
-
old smelly meat..
-
from the BBQ, so TFM and OceanDream went...
-
And burnt the shoes...
-
one the shoes had a krab in it..
and..
-
they put the crab in a puddle
-
of octopus slime, so...
-
and the crab died..
so..
-
They gave it a burial at sea...
-
But TFM dearly wanted to keep the skull because
-
he wanted too collect all skuls of animals ::)
-
So he put it in his bag and..
-
Buried it as a treasure,
But when he checked back to dig is up again. It was gone! :o
So TFM went on...
-
too the other members too see who had stolen it
-
First he looked at VirtualSkipper, since he knew first
-
was interested in some skulls to
-
then he looked at the oceandream sins he knew that he likes killing crab...
-
So TFM put his hand into his bag and pulled out..
-
a book about ferries... :evil:
-
And some cream..
-
and volume 2 of a book about ferries :angel:
-
but there was no skull of a crab in the bag. ::)
TFM...
-
went to the store to...
-
order a milkshake. The man from "There will be Blood" appeared and said: I.....drink.....your....MILKSHAKE! The man drank up TFM's milkshake and...
-
Attempted to drink it, however TFM liked his milkshake, so told him to drink someone elses...
-
Cup of coffee, but the man...
-
started laughing, and then he took off his face mask to reveal his true identity as...
-
Elmo (seseme street)
-
But than he took of another mask and he actually was...
-
ocean dream ;D
-
Suddenly, behind ocean dream, a door slowly opened, and through it appeared..
-
(http://www.cmdshiftdesign.com/blog_images/061208/legoman.jpg)
-
Lego Lars de haan! then Lars said ''you didnt expect that didn't ya''
-
Alarmed by seeing the creature, there was only one thing he could do, so he reached into his bag and pulled out his..
-
his AN-94 and aimed towards the creature.
Until......
-
he realized it was a salami..
-
He was mad because he wanted to use his new-
(http://www.philohome.com/remover/remover6.gif)
Lego unbricker thingymabober on the Lego man..
-
then Lego Lars yelled ''Dont take me good ol' head off''
-
...while VirtualSkipper stole Lego Lars' head he give his head to the...
-
the cats as a toy :evil:
So...
-
the cats as a toy :evil:
So...
Lego Lars tought ''Hmm It seems like alot of people want me outta here or dont like me''
-
Then Lego man started to dissolve! he looked down to find ...
-
...his ticket for a mini-cruise on the PoR, but...
-
....he looked out of the window and saw the PoR sailing out from port
-
Then he realized his ticket was for the next P&O ferry so he went to the dock and sat on...
-
the bench and a tidal wave came and swept the next ferry away so he...
-
Ran to find the ferry {that landed right in her berth} when he realized his head got pulled off in the wave [remember, hes a lego man ;) ] so he...
-
jumped up on the highest wall to find where his ticket had landed to suddenly find....
-
A boxed copy of SSE with a manual included!! So he went home to use it only to find...
-
it was a giant birthday cake
p.s leave me alone!!!
-
After reading the frosting on the cake that said "read larsdehaan's recent posts" so he went on his computer and found this
p.s leave me alone!!!
...
-
Yes, I.m serious ......... leave me alone ......... so that I can eat my cake in peace !
-
But before Lego man could eat he had to find his head!...
-
he looked and searched every where...Untill he founded its head floathing in the POR Terminal.
He...
-
Jumped in the water, not knowing that ANOTHER POR was getting ready to berth, since he had no head :o
Just before he got ran over.....
-
He grabbed his head and put it on. But he put it on up-side down! Then the P&O ferry hit him and he...
-
dived down under the water...BUT Suddenly the propellers sucks him in :evil: ::).
And..
-
and cut off his Lego leg! Then out of nowhere a ...
-
a mermaid came saved him from the propeller ::)
he....
-
Kissed the mermaid, Then the mermaid......
-
Slapped him in the face and stuffed his disconnected Lego head in the P&O's prop!! So now Mr.Lego is headless, but alive.Then Mr. Lego swims to the surface and...
-
Sits on a park bench on the pier and waits for the passenger to get off the ship, so he can...
-
Disconnect the passangers head, and make it his own head..
so...
-
He walks towed a passenger and then ...
-
the passenger says that they were re-fueling... and he was the only passenger... (the passenger runs off to the sight of the headless Lego Man) So he sneaks aboard ship and hides in the bridge. The captain walks in....
-
and sees the the headles lego man..
He...
-
Makes an odd sound, like... "oglewoglewaaaaaa" and faints, on spot.......... Which pushed the throttle to 100% :o
-
then a loud noise came from the engineroom.... which made the ship....
-
rattle and shake then sudenly the mast collapsed and knocked...
-
a lorry ,which was standing besides the ship, down the hill.
the lorry....
-
hit the empire state builduing because they were in new york and it.....
-
...collapsed, causing the whole building to disappear into a cloud of rubble. After the dust cloud settled, there stood...
-
a man, who was not happy, it was.....
-
... The Stig!!!...
-
what he did then was amazing he took off his helmet and...... :o
-
Got fired.. Just then Batman and Robin sailed up in the Batamaran..
-
and then a terminator blew them all up but suddenly the lego man found a...
-
cow...
-
The Cow says "MOOO"
So..
-
....... he "MOOO"VED over .........
-
Got fired.. Just then Batman and Robin sailed up in the Batamaran..
Haha sorry I just had to post. That made me laugh! :D
-
While Captain Spencer is laughing
Something....
-
...throws a pie at him. Captain Spencer gets very angry and....
-
Threatens to take away Lego man's legs, because he assumes it was the Lego man.
-
But it turned out to be
-
a boulder
-
With a pie shooter, apparently ;D
-
Which shot some pretty darn nice Iceland £3 Frozen Strawberry Gateaus :2thumbs:
-
Then all of a sudden it started to rain pigs! So ...
-
Then all of a sudden it started to rain pigs! So ...
Everyone jumped in a bus.
-
And the buss drove away
But....
-
Someone on the bus was playing Shaa Ra Ra (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yRX1fyshW3c&feature=related) by Daler Mehndi on their Ipod! Then...
-
The Oceandream showes up and says...
-
"I love that song" so he...
-
...ate a bannana. He then jumped from the bus and onto a....
-
a car wich was going the other way
Untill the car....
-
Blows Up!! So Lego man...
-
...called Batman, who came in his Batmobile and picked up legoman. On their way to the amazon railforest Legoman asked Batman one question. He asked...
-
"Do you come from a land down under ? " Batman just smiled and handed him a...
-
A vegemite sandwich
-
Suddenly the Batmobile was struck by a coconut, dropped by a swallow..
-
....... and Batman wondered if the the repairs for the dent would be settled by the insurance company !
-
While Batman was filling out the insurance forms, Legoman saw in the distance..
-
An enlarged worm, emerging from the forest. He...
-
wanted to steal the batmobile, but...
-
Batman told Lego man to get in the bataraman docked at the pier beside them. As they speed away from the dock headed out to sea...
-
he forgot the batmobile was at the garage, because of its broke rearlight, after a policecar did a P.I.T manouvre ( turn the car 180 degrees ) at the batmobile because it was.......
-
stolen from the work shop in new york city
-
but with the light speed travel he went
-
Then he stopped for the old lady crossing the "space street" then he...
-
crashed and he jumped on to a limo
-
with virtualskipper in it, so...
-
the skipper fell out and broke a leg hahaha
-
but than Harry Potter came along and fixed it, now virtualskipper want to kick...
-
batman and show who is ...
-
who is boss and jumped in the batmoble and drove of to pick up hes kids awwww
-
But then...
-
...he received a text message...
-
saying your wife is dead
-
so he fainted from panick
But...
-
and the kids spleash same water over him
-
and then a man with a ak47 cames a long and?
-
gets hit by a buss and dies...
-
... but.... a strange sound came from the distance. All of sudden, a blue police box appeared from nowhere. Once the strange sound stopped, the door opened and out stepped a man dressed in a long coat wearing a blue suit.
He nealt down on the pavement where the umm.. 'mess' was and pulled out a strange looking screwdriver. He pointed it at the pavement and pressed a button.
A white flash appeared, which blinded everyone. After the light dimmed, there stood...
-
a ugly man called
-
Buck Rogers, and his robot buddy Twiki, who has been missing for ages and is back to....
-
kill everyone
hahaHAHA HAHAHA
-
Umm.... what's with the death all of a sudden ;D
They're going to run outa tombstones soon ;D
-
But then a man came driving up, in a truck loaded full of tombstones.. so he..
:doh:
(almost stalled the story there mate... )
-
Started digging holes in the street to bury people. Then Lego man with his missing head and leg ...
-
sorry then the truck was a convoy with rubber duck in it
-
then a little girl said what u doing
-
Then all of a sudden Lego man (with his head and leg) woke up in his Boston apartment!!
-
Hi Craigster,
See the quote below for the game rules. Makes it more interesting this way ;D
Let's try this: a collective story
Each person writes one sentence, then must wait 2 following sentences to write another..
Ok, I'll start:
"As the sun slowly set, he lay in his bunk and could hear the waves gently lapping against the hull..
-
but then
-
A cow walked out of Lego mans closet and...
(Capt. Spencer, thats the second time you almost killed the story!!) ;)
-
ME!? :o
How dare you acuse me of...
-
yh
-
that
-
Killing the Story!!!!!!!!!
Pick up were I left off please.
A cow walked out of Lego mans closet and...
-
craigster, i'm getting the feeling that you're not understanding the rules of the game.
One might even perceive it as post boosting. If you don't want to be responsible for this topic being locked and similar topics becoming off limits, I suggest you post according to the rule that saltydog has set up.
only post if 2 other posts have been made before you, in this story.
-
and there was
-
Well done craigster1..
Seeing how you were the last one before freeciv to post and double post nonetheless, you once again ignore the rule.
Everyone, this story topic is now locked, thanks to craigster1.
If a simple rule can't be followed and if people put post count above keeping a game going according to a rule, then we won't have such a topic at all.
Fred.
-
On popular demand, the story is back. The point was made, so let's continue this once again. And I hope it will be a good one this time. The rules as set by Saltydog still apply.
The last sentence was:
A cow walked out of Lego mans closet and...
-
Thanks Fred! :thumbs:
...wanted to ask to Lego Lars...
-
when the ferry to England was leaving.
the awnser was.....
-
the ferry was actually going to Sweden, and not England...
-
...but luckily there was a...
-
small ferry that was going to England but it was verry....
-
old that it can only house a small car, and when all of the sudden...
-
The Pride of Hull appeared in the port and it was also going to England and stopping in Sweden. But Lego mans ticket was for the small ferry so he...
{Yea!!!! the Story is Back!!!!!!!!!!! ;D :2thumbs: ;D}
-
He waited for a POH passanger too walk by
He...
-
wanted to take his ticket but he realized that that wasnt right, so he......
-
...bought a rope and attached himself to the PoH, but than he found out that...
-
the rope was too short.
But suddenly the POH started undocking and....
-
...VirtualSkipper wanted to cut the rope, but...
-
it was too late the POH sails slowly away with lego man still stuck on the rope :evil:
So...
-
Virtualskipper thought what do i need to do now? suddenly he knew what to do....
-
..., he got himself a speedboat to rescue Lego Lars but VirtualSkipper found it funny to see Lego Lars hoping up and down on the waves, but than...
-
He saw a periscope pop up in the water! It looked at them and then ...
-
a sub came out of the water..
-
And it was the USS Ohio....
-
it slowely approached the POH and......
-
FIEEEWWW!!!!!..It launched 2 missles and....
-
...one missed but the other hit the rope, Lego Lars was loose, but...
-
there still was hope, lego lars saw a big red cillinder ( also known as a bouy ;D ) he was swimming towards the bouy and climbed on it but THEN.......
-
A giant wave knocks Lego Man al the way to....
-
back to The Pride of Hull....
-
Then Lego man wondered why a US navy sub was attacking a US port so he swam over to he sub and...
-
climbed aboard.
Untill he noticed.....
-
A fogbank rolling in with a ghostly apparition sailing towards them and its revealed to be...
-
Columbus' ship the Santa Maria!! Lego man freaked out and grabbed the chainsaw he always carried with him and started to cut through the pad lock on the US sub's hatch then...
-
a long came a trop of us army
-
They discovered they forgot the ammo on the base, so they left. A man came from the Santa Maria, he was...
-
Columbus' twin! He stood on the bow of the ship and said " I am going to consume...
-
The hamburgers at Wendy's". The Lego man was angry and tried to catch Columbus' twin, but...
-
he fell and broke a leg and then
-
i guess the story has ended as no one has carried on from mine
-
he fell and broke a leg and then
...Butcher Pete came to him and said: "Meat is what you need...". He gave the Lego man magic meat, so...
-
he then threw the magic meat at Columbus' twin's head! So the crew of the Santa Maria ...
-
Looks at the twins, says........
-
"It's the Magic Meat of Columbus, Hurrah, Hurrah"!!!
But then suddenly..
-
...the Kraken stole the magic meat, so...
-
They all waled "WEEEEEEEEEEEEEHHHHHHH!!!!!!!" :evil:
But....
-
hope was not lost ( yet )
as the Kraken returned and said it was a vegeterian so.....
-
The Kraken returned the magic meat to the Santa Maria and then he reached up on land and grabbed a tree, ripped it up from the ground and ate it whole! Then ...
-
The vegetarian Kraken dissapeared into the dephs of the ocean, and wasn't seen again that day. Night fell when.......
-
Night fell when.......
The sun went below the horizon. Columbus' twin was getting cold because he left his coat in Spain so he...
-
The sun went below the horizon. Columbus' twin was getting cold because he left his coat in Spain so he...
so he whent to bed while the crew wore watching Ship tv
-
then there was a load knock on his cabin door
-
we have a problem the engines have stopped working
-
When Colombus' twin heared this he was flumaxed because his sailing ship was anchored in Boston harbor! So he was wondering why the nonexistent engines stopped and he wondered why that would matter because they were in port. But then the 1st mate said...
-
...That this Santa Maria was a museum-ship, so columbus' twin...
-
yelled ive got tickets for a museum ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
-
but he found out that....
-
The museum was closed and It won't open until 9am the next day. So...
-
he went there and found out that it was gone
-
Only to discover a note from Columbus saying...
-
ive found a way of make the boat fly... and then
-
he saw a huge museum boat fly over nearly blowing the lego mans head off but then......
-
lego mans head was put back on upside down then ......
-
a police boat pulled up in dock and 4 police officers ran towards lego man and they were about to.....
-
hit him but the the police men triped up and then......
-
all of them fell over each other :doh:
So lego man..
-
got up and ....
-
Walked down the Rose Kennedy Greenway (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rose_Kennedy_Greenway) in downtown Boston toward South Station (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/South_Station) then he boarded the Acela Express (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Acela_Express)headed to Washington DC to complain to congress about the...
I like hyperlinks ;D
P.S. craigster1 and others follow the rules!!
-
Fire damage to the Carnival Spendor. Congress decided to...
-
flee to Hawaii when...
-
suddenly the ghost of the titanic docked in the harbour :o :o
-
The whole city went in silence and looked at the ghost titanic
1000's war ships and heclicopters came and were ready too fire :doh:
Untill....
-
she disipeard in to fin air
-
and then out of nowhere
-
all the naval ships and helicopters looked from left too right.
And.....
-
Titanic's ghost reappears and vanishes every ten minutes, scaring the Navy Ships and Helicopters when...
-
all Titanic's dead sisters also appeared!
its started going dark and cloudy and a cloud bursted with rain. Then through the heavy rain came....
-
a meteor the naval ships....
-
And helicopters flew away :evil:
But for the Ships it was trouble because..
-
they were not fast enough to escape!
but then ........came to the......
-
rescue was iron man
-
and they used this new "Ship-a-nator" too vaporize all the meteor falling ships :doh:
And.....
-
lego man came and started punching the president who suddenly turned up
-
a sudden shock came when an eclipse happend!
the meteors became stronger and even iron man and lego man couldnt take the pace!
when....
-
a blue and whit flashing object came and zapped lego man into it but iron man...
-
stopped the object and threw it back to the meteors!
lego man lost his head.....
-
and the alien turned out to be Homer .j. simpson then lego man....
-
yelled D'oh....
-
and homer punched him and said "hey thats my catchphrase"
-
But then.. A random mailman came and gave Homer a carton of Eggs.. Homer said...
-
:doh: and gave him a christmas gift..
inside the gift was.....
-
I Boxing Glove whaking him in the face with a note mockingly saying...
-
NO REFUNDS and homer threw the eggs out the window
-
the eggs fell on lego man's head..
-
the lego man ran towards the army base and shot at homers craft with a gatlin gun
-
mushy pushy came...
-
and a long came 3,000000 people and........
-
animals too
They were all heading direction.
BUt.....
-
then.....
-
a commercial plane flew above with a sign showing this :o
(http://www.prlog.org/10339115-december-21-2012.jpg)
So all the people....
-
and homer Simpson said doh! :doh: wait what and marge said oh no what could that sign mean?
-
and fry flew over in a hover scooter and said a giant meteor is gonna collide with earth you better get to the evacuation shuttels but then....
-
homers mother, SUPER MAMA came to the rescue...
-
and she baked cookies!....
(fry from futurama?)
-
and then the meteor fell and hit.....
(yep from futurama)
-
the earth was burned like pizza.
and homer said :doh:
-
hmmm pizza
-
and then suddenly homer disapeared and was said not to return till the 45 page of this story game.
so then a lego city war happened....suddenly
-
mega blocks tanks rolled in...
-
and chewing gum was used as a bullet!
and so the fight started just by a little incident
but then lego.....
-
asked Lego Indiana jones for help....
(i need to stop... hyperactive....)
-
indiana jones came for help but was killed instantly in 1 sec.....
-
then lego spongebob and a load of lego bikini bottomers came up and joined in but then....
-
in one hit they all fell into peaces.
But then the MAGIC started when all the pieces of the lego botomers came together to form a new type of lego here
and he/she was called.......
-
lego the A team...
(just showing my new avatar
-
then mr t said get some nuts fool and threw a snickers bar at lego man....
-
lego man swallowed the snicker and used the nuts
and shot it back at the speed of 700km per hour!....
(off topic*why you banned)
-
and it wiped out the rival team but then some lego ninjas came and....
-
sliced lego man in half!
but then....
-
lego man cryed for his mum but he managed to pull himself toghether and hitched a ride with oasis of the seas to get away
-
but the story didnt end for lego man as a large group of lego-heli's
were heading towards the ship!
but then legoman got and idea!
if the heli's are from lego i could..........
-
just grab the bricks and nake something else out of it. So he did. He build a boat that somehow looked like ....
-
the ducky from ss08!
but then....
-
he forgot all about the engine wich crash landed into the local fish and chip shop wich made the...
-
whole thing burn up in flames....
-
one of Lego town's people was horrified and destroyed the FA/18s(http://1215432376_SPLASH.jpg)of the Lego air force out of anger but had an idea...
-
lets eat some cookies and.....
-
throw a partie to celebrate lego man day and they danced the night away but.....
-
Evil gnomes attacked....
-
And everyone started too runaway. :P
And they all came back with AN-94 and Stinger Missle Launchers
So.....
-
the nomes got smashed and the lego men built the nomenator and it did everything lego man says luckily...
-
luckily the robot was made from lego and ran out of legojuice.....
-
unfortanetly each robot had a nuclear warhead in side and blew up when they ran out of legojuice so Lego towns people crowded into blast bunkers but chocolate f-86s dropped ice-cream-bombs on Lego town.....
yummy
-
then they knew there was only one more thing to do.....
-
catch the last ferry to NY were the futurama gang will give the lego men a lift to the moon....
-
and flew them down to the sea again and then....
-
the lego man said.
-
it looks like cheese. I better eat it...
-
and mrs lego moon marshian said "its not cheese you noob" and lego man.....
-
took 1 mini bite out of the cheese...
he swallowed it and...
-
it was deadly so a long came the chippy man and said
-
eat this chippy!
-
Lego man ate the chippy and said...
-
yuk its burnt and chippy man said "yes its burnt because you blew my chippy up" and lego man said......
-
I did!? I don't even know what a chippy is! Then...
-
the chippy took another chippy and said....
-
see this one this represents youre head after im done with you and chippy man squashes the chip and lego man....
-
got barbie and ken to join the story together with Star Wars...
-
but the chippy man went to hit lego mans head he hit barbies and kens and they both died and will never come back till the millionth page.
-
Then out of nowhere there was a BANG
-
and there came a shockwave..
And....
-
everyone who felt it...
-
said "DEEP IMPACT OF COMET HALLEY! :evil:"
But suddenly...
-
another BIG BANG!
so huge that it covered all the universe in big chunks of.....
-
the chippy mans van and got a boeing 747 to land near then gatwick airport to go to the star desrourer to....
-
fly to planet X96857-2345SSO to find his best friend called
-
ET.
Who...
-
was a secret agent....
-
and was going to evryone and.....
-
et said et phone home lego man said what? and et said............
-
Phone Home Lego Freak! :evil:
And Lego Man.....
-
kicked E.T in the crothch and legoman shouted.... :o
-
you trader! get of this planet i hate you and punched E.T. so hard he.....
-
had to go toilet to scream the pain out :C
so then....
-
he came out to go to earth and get the PoD THEN....
-
he flew the pod and as he reached the earths atmosphere his pod got hit by a airbus (747) and the pilot....
-
set course to mars where the earth planned to build their new city called
*hyper City Mars 8000*! but on the way...
-
the engines failed and the pilot rememberd the engines need air so he signalled a passing nasa rocket and....
-
the rocket gave him some fuel, after fueling the pilot started his journey again!..
-
and he said " ONWARD TOO...
-
the Hyper City Mars 8000!!!!
he finally got there and it took him exactly 35 mins,
he space-berthed his jet and put his oxygen helm on to go inside
when he got in the city.....
-
he saw it was completely descerted :o
And he went too look around and saw....
-
Mr. qwertyuiopasdfghjklzxcvbnm ran to when
-
Advertise the large town with...
(And Ferry King, Follow the main rule:)
Each person writes one sentence, then must wait 2 following sentences to write another..
-
a nice picture of space men playing beachball on the beach so the news people back on earth started...
-
he quickly ran to his jet and started his engine to return to planet earth......
*what do you mean matt?*
-
but rememberd the engines that were given to him ran out of fuel when he landed and his normal jet engines dont work in space so he stole someones...
(ferry king that dosent make sense of what you carried on from my post :doh:)
-
Fuel Processor to reactivate the engines with fresh fuel when...
(TFK, The topic was temporarily closed because someone wasn't following the rule I quoted. No one wants that to happen again)
-
it exploded and the jet flew away without Mr. qwertyuiopasdfghjklzxcvbnm
why you little!!!!piece of crapy junk
-
good for nothing stupid jet! he said
And he grabbed a........ :evil:
-
childs hover board and flew away on it but ran out of fuel as soon as he got to the moon wich luckily had a.....
-
had a jimmy neutron jetpack
so he....
-
flew back to earth but still didnt have enough fuel so he hitched a ride with....
-
someone
and took them to onto the stena Euorpe whil trying to get to Ireland and ran out of fule
-
Then all her electricty stopped and a ship was heading strieght for her.
-
it was the pride of rotterdam so she signalled it but realised...
-
It was heading strieght for Stena europa so...
-
he quickly got on board the Oasis of the Seas that was just passing beside him...
-
ad headed toward america ...
*Oasis of the seas near holehead ? ;D*
-
and went straight into port everglades...
*its not funny anymore so stop it >:(*
-
too see where he left his mega yacht called... ::)
-
Bob and...
-
...Billy. His yacht was gone, but was probably boarded by...
-
by secret criminals who were going to use it for....
-
Sinking the USS Nimitz But...
-
they did not succeed.....
-
So they went to
-
Walvis bay
-
and saw something wich made him very....
-
:o Shocked :o
-
and he turned white from shock and walked towards IT
But suddenly!...
-
it exploded and it was right next to a nuclear bomb so.....
-
the timer started ticking down from 60 seconds :evil:
And.............
-
a harrier jump jet landed on the roof and it picked up lego man and flew off at 2,000mph
-
2 hours later, they noticed.....
-
they were running low on fuel and they were in the middle of the atlantic...
-
So IRI5HJ4CK popped by, but laughed at them and continued on his journey :doh:
-
while IRI5HJ4CK Laughs he did not notice where he was going
and BAM!!!
-
he hitted a giant mysterious object....
-
It turned out to be Freedom Ship
(http://www.worldinterestingfacts.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/12/freedom-ship-the-biggest-future-cruise-ship.jpg)
-
and the harrier fell into the water and gets sucked in by props :o.
So.....
-
lego man drowns. the end or is it? :'( :'( :'(
-
*not the end :o*
As the passangers and crew look with panic they are suprides and see....
-
floating around coughing up water
*phew he didnt drown after all*
-
But then a shark ate him all the passangers sighed and got on with normal life but the crew ...
-
said "Deploy the mini sub"!
And......
-
the sub went down the waters and they found the Titanic wreckage when suddenly...
-
the engine of the mini sub failed :o
One the crewmembers started.........
-
To press all the buttons with panic and he pressed a button that said ...
-
"Emergency start"
so......
-
it rose to the surface but coming towards it was ...
-
was a Very large container ship.
WHen they saw it.......
-
They fainted but then ..
-
The sub got hit by the container ship....
-
as the sub got pushed down and under the ship.
They awoke and saw.... :o
-
Lego man wanting in the sub and the crew...
-
So they opened the hatch to let Lego man inside but, they quickly realized they were still under water! So .....
-
The sub filled with water :P
-
and the sub started going down.
And they noticed the propeller of the container ship is sucking them in :evil:
They all......
-
ran to the other end of the sub where there was a little mini sub-raft that could rescue 12 people and tae them to sea level...
-
After the mini sub raft made it too the service.....
-
it was drifting near a undiscoverd island and .....
-
they all got on the island
They noticed lego man was.......
-
Nowhere to be seen so ...
-
and they splitted up too look for lego man.
And.......
-
found a large cave that was dark and scary.... :o
-
and the 2nd guy turned on his flash ligh.
And they enter the dark scary cave and..... :o
-
...saw a massive lego pirate ship. Suddently, someone appeared on the deck of the lego pirate ship. It was...
-
Captain Jack Sparrow asking where is...
-
where lego man is
But the guys were too suprised too reply, So they......
-
Fainted, then Captain Jack Sparrow
NOT IN STORY: (Dang my Lego man has gone a long way :o)
-
...drunk from his bottle of rum, and said...
-
Who is writing this story!? This bottle of rum has been empty for 94 . . .
-
94 years. they all then woke up and almost fainted again :sleepy: be cause they saw lego man walking out of the cargo hold dressed up like
-
Peter Pan. So they quickly ran to the weapon storage...
-
and came back with some older guns ::)
And Lego man.....
-
was just in the indian Ocean when he looked at his clock and said *new year already?*
-
and he tried getting too the nearest land when suddenly......
-
A shark swallowed him!!
-
and then the shark puked him out and said.........
-
*yuck* you smell like lego (lol).......
-
Which can never smell as nice as fresh Marmite...
-
Which Matt would not know as he has never had marmite...
-
...so the Lego Man swum to an island, called...
-
cuba where he met...
-
other lego people who...
-
were pale and not yellow
-
so he said "i come in one piece" but the people didn't understand him :-\
:lol: ;D
(not in story... Who came up with Lego man????)
-
Because in Cuba they speak Spanish. But Lego mans head is full of plastic so he thought he was talking to aliens from Jupiter. So the Cubans...
-
grabbed torches and sharp pitch forkes.
When lego man saw that he.......
-
had wet himself in fear and cryed while holding a.....
(dexter legoman was in story agers ago he just got knocked out for a bit)
-
Ak-47 machine gun so he called his old friend Lego Indiana jones and a great war happened with giant homer Simpson squishing Cuban dudes
-
Then, Ché Guevara came across. He said:...
-
bleurg lego man says what and he says bleurg and they all say...
-
"Patch 1.3 is out! Hurrahh!! " Then they say...
-
one guy shouts* But Red Jet still hasnt got water jets ahhhhhhhhhhh ........
-
one of the cubans translates bleurg to be hi so lego man.....
-
ran and got an automatic translator that can translate anything but....
-
that translator wasn`t working, so...
-
he said COME ON!!! and threw it on the ground...
-
and saw an M4A1 on the ground, but...
-
it didnt work as tecnology wasnt invented yet cus he realised he went back in time
-
65 million lego years (one million lego years equal 30 human years)
-
and when lego man looked too the tv inside the store he saw the year......
-
Was the year before the great...
-
lego hero raised, named ...
-
usibjhzxehiomeht but he couldent prenounce it and he said.....
-
ultrazexman or better known as..
-
Obama, The great black lego hero who...
-
is the president of the united lego states...
-
but united lego states doesn`t exist, so he...
-
but united lego states doesn`t exist, so he...
he yelled doh and...
(btw living lego doesnt exist either...)
-
and went Doh agean
-
and again, and again, and again, and again, until...
-
and again, and again, and again, and again, until...
homer simpson hit him.....
-
Hormer said Doh and Obama said ...
-
Take this crazy man away to the secret Lego service but he resisted with his huge size by...
-
sitting on all the guards
-
Homer said Doh again and ran off to find.....
-
bsod and sovle the problem but then...
-
he spotted planet x he thaught and he realised the internet was telling the truth the metor is about to hit now its 2011 and lego man called.....
-
a hero that was so strong and though his name was.......
-
...The Govenator. He pointed at Homer Simpson and said (with his accent):...
-
you were the one who did this so marge said "oh Homie"....
-
and Homer said *oh Maggie...........
-
i love u do u wont a drink of redbull
-
and then Capitan bob stopped dreaming about Lego and realized his ship hit an iceberg.
-
He quickly ran to the port side of the bridge and he saw that.........
-
the iceburg was just a rif in the middel of the atlantic ocean
untill......
-
the bob barker rammed him.
then he shouted ...
-
ohhhh flip
Where did you come from??
And.......
-
he quickly got a stick to hit him but then.......
-
he quickly got a stick to hit him but then.......
The Igor K came to the rescue (ss08 tug...)....
-
but the steve irwin ramed the igor x. :doh:
-
...and the crew threw butric acid on the tug. So the people on the tug...
-
...and the crew threw butric acid on the tug. So the people on the tug...
....ran for cover and found they were taking on water after being rammed ....
-
and they tried sealing the large hole
but............
-
and they tried sealing the large hole
but............
they notice the other boat was preparing to ram them again.....
-
but they all of the sudden heard a boom and saw lego man on a (http://ts3.mm.bing.net/images/thumbnail.aspx?q=405961847846&id=12d2fd66fc15be65a6037087b4566e09&url=http://www.scificool.com/images/2009/11/Battleship_003.jpg)
-
giant WW2 warship
As the ship stopped next to them, Lego man said ".........
-
giant WW2 warship
As the ship stopped next to them, Lego man said ".........
"is there a problem here?" the guys on the now sinking tug boat rolled there eyes and shouted "no shit sherlock"
-
"Darn watch your language" Lego man said "let's get you guys off of there" but...
-
as soon as they get aboard they saw someting that was a.............
-
as soon as they get aboard they saw someting that was a.............
an incoming torpedo from a leggo submarine that was too close to intercept
-
And someone yelled "Brace for lego impact!" when...
-
the torpedo crippled the ship and cut all power
-
and the lego submarine hatch opened up.
and out came....
-
the sonic boom torpedo that could shoot miles away from a high speed of.............
-
12kn. But McGherkin appeared from nowhere and....
-
made the day by drinking a.......... ::)
(do i even need to say it)
-
bottle of buteric acid sea Shepard threw.
but then all lego blew up forever.
-
And everyone was a in a big silence :o.....
(is this the end of lego man? :'()
-
yes it is lego man rip.
but then the esperenza told sea Shepard of for being to violent.
-
Rest in peace LOL ;D all Lego people attended the funeral :doh:. But on the bright side sea shepherd was not banned from the southern ocean :D :D :D
(Not in story) please don't be the end of Lego man he's awesome
-
Then a long time ago in a galaxy far far away ...
-
Lego man's evil clone :evil: was destroying a planet named...
-
tatooine :doh:
But then yoda killed him.
-
Yoda ran to a shop nearby a town to buy..........
-
Yoda ran to a shop nearby a town to buy..........
a new lego man...
-
was born and the history repeated
And he........
-
he married a apple pie,
whilst on the way to the honeymoon there _____(insert mode of transport here) was hijacked by ______
-
All lego blew up forever and Capitan bob decided to buy the m.v ...
-
cow 2....
(you really like explosions dont you)
-
cow 2....
(you really like explosions dont you)
[not in story yes i like explosions and i dont want lego in our story]
but then his new ship was hit by the ghost of ss france
(http://www.dvomarinedesign.com/vs/big_u-vs-gost.jpg)
oh no!
-
but then the ghost of titanic apeared and the ghost of france retreated
-
but then it hit a ghost iceberg and sank and the ghost of ss united states said ''ha ha!''
-
but then the ghost of the ghost of the titanic appeared
-
and blew the horn 3 times untill.........
-
it was rammed by ghost busters.
-
who for some reason had a hotdog instead of a ray gun so he retreated
-
then the giant marshmallow man rose right up out of the sea in front of the gohstbusters' ship
-
and said "Stop or be ghostefied!"
and they.....
-
started throwing their hot dogs at him XD
(not in story now i'm starting to regret saying "but..." in one of my posts) (before Lego man died)
-
But then they realized hot dogs don't stop giant marshmallows or Titanic ghosts.
-
they were almost Gohstefied but he changed his mind and started destroying
-
the giant UFO wich was floating above them
and.....
-
then the UFO Abducted him and then marshmallow man saw Bryce (not in story Bryce is from Google Sketch-Up download GSU8 and search "Bryce" in the GSU warehouse theres alot about him)
(http://file:///C:/Users/Owner/Documents/Bryce.png)
-
then the ghost of the admiral graf spee arrived and shot down the ufo
-
The UFO came down and hit the ghost busters ship...
-
then Aad the pirate came to save the day!...
-
then Aad the pirate came to save the day!...
....while the admiral graf spee lay at anchor with its main guns aimed at where the ufo crashed
-
....while the admiral graf spee lay at anchor with its main guns aimed at where the ufo crashed
Seeing the crash, the captin ran inside the bridge, mashed the panic stations alarm and then noticed...
-
the ghost of the scharnhorst and gneisenau had also apeared but.....
-
...Something appeared from the UFO. It was Admiral Ackbar! He said...
-
....give me your potatoe salad for i am hungry on this beautiful day
-
or else ill need to Allahu ackbar you....
(that means to blow himself up + you)
-
no please dont and i will nevar give you my potato salad and your bombs well they are just sausages painted red with tnt writen on them.....
-
at that moment every1 had noticed that the ghosts of scharnhorst and gneisenau had.....
-
at that moment every1 had noticed that the ghosts of scharnhorst and gneisenau had.....
Pasta!
(http://i54.tinypic.com/2a8hohi.png)
-
and that the pasta was actally little space ships
-
or else ill need to Allahu ackbar you....
(that means to blow himself up + you)
allah akbar actually means "god (is) great" and given the bin laden case at the moment is perhaps in a bit bad taste don't you think?
Have you ever seen the aftermath of a terrorist bombing? Until you have kindly learn that some phrases aren't appropriate.
-
allah akbar actually means "god (is) great" and given the bin laden case at the moment is perhaps in a bit bad taste don't you think?
Have you ever seen the aftermath of a terrorist bombing? Until you have kindly learn that some phrases aren't appropriate.
There was a recent terrorist bombing?
-
allah akbar actually means "god (is) great" and given the bin laden case at the moment is perhaps in a bit bad taste don't you think?
Have you ever seen the aftermath of a terrorist bombing? Until you have kindly learn that some phrases aren't appropriate.
sorry to say pal but i posted that waaaay before all this happend
(and yes i know what it means)
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is this story still with us god it was ages ago sence i last posted on here
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sorry to say pal but i posted that waaaay before all this happend
(and yes i know what it means)
Either way you are making light of terrorist activities, which is perhaps a little sick. I will not be the one to apologise. If you think terrorism is funny or amusing I can introduce you to people that have been blown up and critically injured.
At your age I am surprised you think terrorists are amusing. I will not apologise nor will I retract my comment. If you had good grace you would do so.
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Let's keep it at that, shall we?
Point well made, that is indeed not a phrase to be uttered just like that, as it might be seen as blasphemy... just like you should also not do that with any other religion's holy words, or whatever you would like to call it. It might insult people, or disrespect their beliefs. And that's not what we do here.
Best not even to go there and write such things, specially when it's delicate like that, and leave such religious references out.
But also not something to crucify someone about... err.. did I say crucify, oops.. I mean.. well you know what I mean.. ::)
play nice gents!! :thumbs:
Regards,
Fred
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Back to the story
the little spaceships were going to destroy planet...
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Indeed..Let's stay o.t. ;)
Back to the story
the little spaceships were going to destroy planet...
Vixen, in the Quadramongo Nebula. Little did they know they had a secret weapon, which was..
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A talking banana that shot out lazors of....
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fire but fire doesn't burn in space so...
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the ghost of the admiral raf spee blew up its self and ....
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it destroyed all the space ships but the one with the king. so...
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it destroyed all the space ships but the one with the king. so...
gneisenau moved in to destroy it while scharnhorst.....
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commanded a rebellion that...
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attacked the king's ship to create a diversion for gneisenau use his super weapon... :doh:
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But also not something to crucify someone about... err.. did I say crucify, oops.. I mean.. well you know what I mean.. ::)
Haha... Someone's been watching Life of Brian.... ;D
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attacked the king's ship to create a diversion for gneisenau use his super weapon... :doh:
The Marmite maker, which was aimed right at....
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the captain of the boat
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It missed... Shot again missed, "Sir, We need another shooter!"
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you shoot
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"But, But, But, I-" "You're better than that! Shoot!"
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"fine
get Jason the chef to shoot, he's only cooking a turky"
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"Did he shoot it?" "Yes!" with what?" "a gun" "A gun is not a marmite maker!, now shoot!"
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"no dont shoot!" says the turkey "i need to be eatten first!"
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Then we'll feed you to the lions!
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what lions
this a boat in the alantic ocean
not a zoo
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"Oh well!" "We have Lions, Do we have lions?" "No!" "Then we'll throw you overboard!"
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still, chef so bad of a cook he'll probily kill all of fish who eat it
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"Just shoot!" "Chef, You Shoot!"
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"I can't shoot! I'm just the chef!"
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"I can't shoot! I'm just the chef!"
"Can you throw knives?"
Way to go!
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*throws knives*
"there we go!"
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"Knives won't sink it!!!" "What will?" "erm... A Marmite maker!
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"yes! marmite! its the only way!"